12th Sunday in Ordinary Time, June 20, 2004

3) 12th Sunday in Ordinary Time, June 20, 2004
Monday, June 14, 2004. This week (Monday – Friday) every morning 8.45 to 11.15, I have a summer class given by a Salesian Indian priest, Joe Mannath, SDB. The spirituality course with the code of S438S is entitled A Closer Look at Life’s Best Gifts same as his book he writes. Today we learned about Love and Forgiveness. After class I went to Border bookstore on 53rd Street bought some books. In the afternoon and night I read some books that I have bought today.
Tuesday, June 15, 2004. Today the class I delved about Happiness and Humor. Today the professor gave an assignement about a final paper for this class, namely, a 6-10 page based on the reading and reflection; hopefully, I can do and finish it at the end of this course next Friday. In the evening after supper, I did ‘kerokan’, scratching my body with coin since I was feeling sick and dizzy. Early in the morning Alejandro and Chuy flew to Mexico for vacation.
Wednesday, June 16, 2004. I had a class in the morning with the topics of Emotions, Sexuality and Family then I was repairing a blue bicycle that I took it a couple of months ago and tried to use it on State street and Lake Michigan. Hoepfully, I can use it for my ministry next semester on 28th street/ South Normal, close to Chinatown, about 6 miles. Today I was cooking soup, rice and lasagna.
Thursday, June 17, 2004. In the morning I attended a class with topics about body and health, intelligence, fantasy and creativity. In the afternoon I was typing my 10-page final paper of Closer Look at the Life’s Best Gifts and I finished it at night. At five p.m. we had a holy hour led by Father Rocco in which Petrus also attended it. Father Adolph came back from his holy-land tour of Israel and shared his gifts to us, a small rosary and showed us a beautiful wooden crafted of the Last Supper that he bought also in Israel.
Friday, June 18, 2004. In the morning at a quarter to seven we had a Mass presided by Father Victor and presented by Father Adolph and me. At 7.30 a.m. to 8.30 a.m. we had lectio divina guided by Father Victor. I attended the last class of this week at CTU and submitted my 10-page paper that I share to you also at the end of this letter. After went home, I headed to downtown Chicago to shop some clothes at GAP and strolled along Michigan Avenue. In the evening Sony, svd and Gaby picked me up then we went to Rina-Budi’s house for Indonesian prayer. We delved from the Scripture led by Budi and shared our faith experience about HOPE. It lasted with karaoke till midnight.
Saturday, June 19, 2004. In the morning at 7.15 I attended a Mass led by Father Victor then I called up some of my relatives and friends in Indonesia in order to keep in touch and uttering greeting. From this call I got information from Purnomo, OFM that Scalabrinian is no longer in Jakarta because they moved their seminary to Flores. In the afternoon after doing laundry and rest, I went to Chinatown by bike about 30 minutes by bicycle through State Street. It’s fun to go by bike like my hobby in Jakarta but I don’t whether I could do it in winter season, we’l l see. Petrus invited me to play tennis with Nolan and it’s my first experience to have it. Actually the place we played tennis is very close to David Dardst Spirituality Center, on 28th Street and South Normal. Unluckily, our car got flat tyre after playing tennis then the window glass fell down. In the evening till at 1 a.m., I had a fraternal sharing with Petrus.
Sunday, June 20, 2004. I was sleeping one night at Chinatown parish then in the morning at 7.20 I went to David Dardst Spirituality Center. I was lost because my map I drew was wrong, instead of 28th street, I went to 18th street then I realized that the number of the house is 2834 which means it is located on 28th street. This retreat house is going to be my ministry site for my ministry practicum I from CTU beginning in September till next year. There was a retreat of St. Bernadeth parish youth from Appleton-Wisconsin about 16 people. I met some youth volunteers who live in this house such as David (Pennsylvania), George (Houston-Texas), Gayle (Missouri), Kelsea (Elgin-Chicago), Amy (New Jersey). They welcomed me nicely. I followed them to have a Mass at 9 a.m. at Saint Basil Catholic Church on Garfield street then we went to Su Casa, a Catholic Worker house. We had a lunch at the soup kitchen of this Su Casa where some immigrant families from Guatemala and Nicaragua live there. We’re in line having the lunch together with some African-American people on the side of the road then we ate in the dining room while Freida, an African-American woman who helps share food to the homeless shared her story to us. There were about 16 people in this retreat and most of them youth, about 11 to 17 years old and all of them Caucasian. We went back to the retreat house and I was sleepy reading some magazines. I had a nice conversation with a girl volunteer named Gayle who wants to study at CTU. At 4 p.m. we once again went to a homeless shelter, Lakeview Shelter in the same building of Lutheran Lakeview Church. We had supper and played card and other games together with the homeless people who were male African-American mostly. At 8 p.m. we went home to the retreat house. A quarter to nine p.m. I went back to Hyde Park by bicycle. It’s a great experience to introduce myself to this kind of ministry site. I was interested to the youth who have concern to justice and peace problem implemented on this retreat. I am glad to have this site because it will improve my social concern to their mission and my English especially dealing with White Native American people. Hopefully, I can contribute also my experience as an Asian among them.
A CLOSER LOOK AT LIFE’S BEST GIFTS

INTRODUCTION
I am very grateful to have this class that is taught by Father Joe Mannath, SDB from Madras University, India, from 14-18 June 2004 at CTU in the summer institute. Indeed, it is easy to talk about many good things but it is so difficult to implement them in our daily lives. The best gifts I learned and pondered based both on the class/reading and my own experiences are keys to write down this paper. These experiences mostly I never forget in my life because they are touching my heart deeply. I choose four themes, namely, Forgiveness, Happiness, Family and Intelligence/Fantasy/Mind. Thanks be to God that I have time to ponder and write it at least with this paper so that they are not kept and remained only in my memory but also for others. Hopefully, it will be helpful also as my sharing to others that I send to all of my friends by e-mail on my weekly journal. I do believe that happiness as one topic I write here is fulfilled if it shared. I share this reflection to others whom I love and pray for as my friends, confreres and family in God’s love.

FORGIVENESS
My experience proves that forgiveness leads a healing process both in myself (heart, body and mind) and relationship with others. This experience of forgiveness I never forget in my life, namely, a conflict between my friend and I in an office when I was working. It began with an honest but improper information about him that I told to others. It cost him anger to me that I did mistake to him. He was so angry to me till others knew the problem. I felt very sorry about my mistake but I did not have courage to ask pardon to him even though every day I was treated as an enemy by him. I just kept silent and quiet in front of him but I respected him as my friend. It lasted almost a half of year till someday he approached me to ask me something about Catholic retreat that he wanted to follow because he wished to converse from his bad habits. Before it happened, every day and Sunday I always tried to pray and remember him in my prayer especially when I had a Mass in a Catholic Church. I prayed for him incessantly and felt sorry about my fault talking about him that cost him very angry. If I remembered this event, my heart was so injured because many people whom he spoke were hated me. He told to many people that I was such a bad person. In the beginning, it was very difficult to remember of him in my memory and prayer but because every day I always met him and went together to our office in a same car so I liked to be healed both relationships with him and myself. It is incredible that one day he asked me to know a retreat he wanted to follow. In that time I just got a flyer of Choice retreat from a Church I attended on Sunday Mass, so I offered it to him. He agreed to take it and I invited him to follow it together, even I registered him at this retreat. We went together as friend and we from this retreat we had many friends who finally have influence to his life and also my life. It is such a good influence that lead us to have a mutual friendship based on a same faith, even until now he still gets along with some of them. A couple of months ago he called me up several times informing his situation and asking prayer. Briefly, I do believe that with fervent prayer for somebody who makes me hurt, I finally get a healing whatever the result will be. It grants me a joy and peace in my deep heart. This reconciliation is not enough with uttering pardon toward somebody but more than this is our attitude and treatment in daily lives that reflect this reconciliation. Such a continuous prayer toward somebody, talking about one’s goodness and not the opposite will guide me to healing both him/her and myself.
Another experience that recently I endured is a conflict between my confreres that cost me bad feeling. I knew little bit the cause of their conflict and I could not stay calmly seeing their anger to one another in their chatting till one left with tears, I am supposedly guest. Even though the conflict is not about me but the others (my confreres) but it impacted on my heart and my mind. My mind and heart also were hurt to know this thing happened; I was not feeling happy at all. I tried to talk to one of them suggesting that he should approach him asking pardon or clarifying the problem. When I approached him, I said my passion and concern about their relationship that could be repaired and better. Because of my heart was so sad, so when I talked to him, I was almost crying. Thanks be to God, after a couple of days both of them finally have a good and better friendship, fraternal understanding each other. To see they have a nice chatting makes me happy and grateful. It gives me a lesson that reconciliation needs an agent who has initiative to make it. Often times people are hesitate and shame to admit and initiate forgiveness because they feel in the right way or they think that the problem will be resolved in times. But actually the problems are accumulated and will explode in one occasion. So, mutual understanding and real forgiveness each other are very important in reconciliation.

HAPPINESS
When I studied philosophy there is a word in Greek, eudaimonia, that means happiness. Nobody who lives in the world does not want to achieve it in all one’s efforts. Happiness is often times thought in the wrong way in achieving a material/physical, event, situation, relation and momentary things. In fact, after we achieve them we still have a longing, unfulfilled and unhappiness feeling. It seems that we never achieve an everlasting happiness in this world. Like the condition we can say that somebody is healthy we could not definitely claim in a long time because healthy is a dynamic condition that sometimes someone could get sick. The happiness as well is not a fixed condition but always a dynamic condition in our lives. After I experience happy things then I will have unhappy experiences and this mechanism always happens in my life constantly. The happiness because of outer/physical things will not last forever but happiness because of internal and spiritual things will last forever. In this class I learned about four kinds of experiences of happiness, namely, relation with others, achievement, religious experience and pain-happy experience.
In my experience having relation with others led me to both joy/happiness and painful experience. After I ponder about my relation to others, I can say that I am grateful to be in the midst of others, that are, my family, my friends, my confreres, my classmates, and so on. I am formed by my family where I was born and raised, by the environment that gave me identity and role in the society and small group. After I live in the USA, I feel closer to my family and some friends and confreres who live in Indonesia than before. With the technology such as telephone card and Internet, I can constantly keep in touch with them, even more than when I lived in Indonesia. By these tools as well I found some friends, who are very kind like we have known each other before. It is a positive advantage that I can get of it. Not every relation to others will last forever because after we move to other place we will forget many people we dealt with and it is normal. I have an ideal dream that I can keep in touch with my own family and close friends wherever and whenever I will be, but in fact this dream will not be fulfilled all the time with the time-running, business and my aging process. Finally, the spirituality is all about losing the Ego and journey to let go many things or diminishing of everything.
The second thing is happiness because of achievement of doing something. I was very happy when eventually I got my student visa to the USA after almost four months I had to wait for. Even until now I still feel happy and grateful of this grace that I believe is not from myself but from many people who prayed for me. My happiness in this thing does not last forever because after being in the USA I have other things that I want to be happy. So, my happiness does not finish with my achievement getting the visa. I have another achievement to pursue my happiness that is finishing my study and becoming a priest in next three years. After I achieve those ideals, I believe I will have another goal that I think will make me happy. In conclusion, the happiness because of achieving some goals in our life does not fulfill our real-last happiness that is unity with God. It is always good that I have some goals in a period of time but I should not stop in that goals but should go on from one to another goal that eventually I have to be happy with God who accompany me in my journey. The real happiness actually is here and now (hic et nunc). If I can feel happy here and now, most likely I can feel happy in my goals in the future. I have tendency to see my far future of achieving something such as finishing my study, final vows, ordination, and so on without try to feel the recent happiness that I can feel right now, here in my room typing this paper and listening music from radio with warm weather. I should be happy with this grace that I have now.
Religious experience that I have experienced is always ups and downs. Sometimes I have a good sense and feeling to do my prayer, relation with God but another time I feel far away from God because of my sin and Ego. To be aware of this dynamic spiritual experience, I have to surrender faithfully to God’s will, which is voiced in my heart and others both in good and bad situation. With a bad situation there is still God’s presence there and I should draw the meaning of it. It is difficult, indeed, but with the spiritual practice that I have in my ups and downs experience, I believed I could get the God’s message step-by-step. For instance, with the lost of my I-20 in Rome before I came to the USA, it was struck me deeply and I was trying to see what God wanted to me after difficulties I faced to get the USA visa then I had to suffer again. At least I got the message that I have to be careful and humble with what I have gotten and I have to be grateful that finally I could go to the Xaverian mother house in Parma and met with so many confreres both in Rome and Parma. My plan is not God’s plan, that what was really evident in my life. I believe with a constant relationship with God in my daily prayer and trying to be aware of the God’s presence in my life, I feel very happy even though I still have unhappiness in my life. At least with the God, who is present in my life, I feel happy and safe.
The last thing is the pain experience could draw the happiness. I have many experiences of lost members of my family such as my mother’ and grandmother’s death. It seemed very painful that I did not have a female figure in my early life (aged of 9 and 17) but with this experience once again God invites me to see many good and positive things that I have to be more autonomous in daily life and feeling. According to a psychologist that I have a deep trauma losing a father’s figure is really struck me and brought me down in the end of my novitiate year. But, I was happy to have this experience of awareness that I admitted it. My master of novice advised me to forgive my father with all of my heart in my prayer such as ‘visitatio amoris’ (in prayer I have to see God’s love even in the sorrow things). Probably, people in my hometown will never imagine and believe that my father has five ‘good’ children that none imitate his bad characteristics. They do not know the positive things of my father how he educated his children with good things even though he could not give good example of life but he always emphasized that we are as his children should be good persons and never imitate and follow his bad attitude. I can forgive and accept fully my father with his positive and negative sides. From this experience I can say that God still loves me in a certain family and especially my father. With the painful example I can live a good life from my father and others. No need to imitate bad side of our parents but we should take positive things of our parents, then it will be a virtue that we have to do in our life to face others.
Finally, I have a deep conviction that happiness is fulfilled in my internal disposition not because of my outside things but my relation with myself and God, then my happiness will be fulfilled if I share to others.

FAMILY
Talking about family, I was impressed by the explanation of the professor in this class that the formation in seminary or novitiate is initiated in one’s family. I do agree that my family has a big influence to my formation in the Xaverian seminary. I have impression that with knowing my family better with positive and negative things, the formator will be helped to accompany me in the journey of this formation. I was very happy having a class of family dynamic in the pastoral care setting at last spring quarter in which I made my genogram of my own family till four generation. From this, I can show to my formators my own family with my hope that they will know my disposition and my characteristic now are influenced by this origin.
Furthermore the professor pointed out that we are influenced by our own family but we are not determined by it. It is evident in my own family that nobody will predict that my father’s children would grow very well in his care. Even though there are some negative aspects of my father but we as his children are not influenced so much, even we could discern the good and the bad and chose the good things and avoid the bad things. Normally, people will say that the children will not far from the father’s attitude and carrier. But in fact, it happened the opposite way and thanks God for this in my own family and the merit of my grandmother who accompanied my siblings and me till we all become better person in our own life now. Also, I am very grateful to both of my older sisters who gave me good example in my life so that I can be like now. Because I owe many good things on my own family so I always try to keep in touch with them even though we are far away in distance. By phone regularly, I call them up to share and strengthen one another.
I have a new meaning of family especially after I live in the Xaverian missionaries. My family is not only my nuclear family or blood ties, but the Xaverian family as the founder of the Xaverian stated in his dream to unite one world in one family. It is my family now such as my own mother whom I live out my vocation for whole of my life. I still have a good relationship and longing to know about my own confreres in Indonesia. That is why I always keep in touch with them as well by phone and Internet. I have a good feeling about my Indonesian confreres, so I try to give them my own story via letter and e-mail wherever they are now.
Moreover my family is not only the Xaverian and my nuclear family but everybody who is present in my life. Whomever I meet somebody in my daily lives he/she is my family in God’s love. It is fulfilled not with this statement but with my attitude and my heart to treat each other as the same son and daughter of the same God. “How very good and pleasant it is when kindred live together in unity” (Psalm 133:1).

INTELLIGENCE/ MIND/ FANTASY
I do agree that we have a high potentiality of our brain/mind and most of the time we just waste of the time not to use it optimally. I have time that I waste in my dream about my future and not use the present time in a proper and useful thing. I always busy predicting what is going to happen next but not really use the now-time effectively. Doing this paper also is the last night before I submit it tomorrow even though I have plenty of time to do it since a couple of days ago but I always postpone it a couple of times and pretending that I have enough time to do it. I tend to waste of my time only in the mind but not realized in the reality. It is maybe because of my laziness and my hesitancy to whether I could be success to do it.
I believe that we as human being have a tremendous fantasy to do marvelous thing. Recently, I always thought that I should buy a used-good bicycle even though in my house there are some bicycles that I need to fix little bit. In some months I only thought how to fix them. I gave up when first time I saw it and pretend I could not repair it. Every time I come to the bicycle room, my mind always think how to fix it till some day after the class of this summer institute, that is, this class (Closer Look), I was trying to fix it. It took some time but I could make it. What I have thought before just with little eagerness and effort then I could fix it and now I can use it for going to school or ministry to Chinatown. Briefly, my intuition to do something is fulfilled when I do it earnestly and not stick on my dream or fantasy only. Thanks God for this grace that I still have a dream, fantasy and mind to do a good and better thing in my life. In the same time I pray to God to give me courage to be able to implement this gifts in my real life for the goodness of others.

CONCLUSION
Once again I want to utter my heartfelt thanks to the professor of this course, Father Joe with his knowledge, humor and wisdom has given me deep reflection upon the best gifts I have in my life and then I should cultivate them more and more. The four gifts I ponder and write above are just little things in my life that I record in my mind and floppy disk. I believe that I still have a lot of gifts that I should dig-down deeper in my life based upon my experience as the real wisdom and teacher I ever have. God has given his best gifts in my life like Saint Paul states: “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor. 12: 9).


3) Hari Minggu Biasa ke-12, 20 Juni 2004
Senin, 14 Juni 2004. Minggu ini (Senin-Jumat) setiap pagi hari jam 8.45 hingga 11.15, saya mengikuti kuliah yang diberikan oleh seorang dosen yaitu seorang pastor Salesian Don Bosco asal India bernama Joe Mannath, SDB. Kuliah spiritualitas dengan kode S438S ini berjudul Tinjauan Lebih Dekat atas Rahmat Terbaik Dalam Kehidupan, sesuai bukunya sendiri. Hari ini kami belajar mengenai Cinta dan Pengampunan. Setelah kuliah saya pergi ke toko buku Border di Jalan 53 membeli beberapa buku. Di sore dan malam hari saya menikmati bacaan buku-buku yang saya beli hari ini.
Selasa, 15 Juni 2004. Hari ini dalam kuliah saya mendalami tema tentang Kebahagiaan dan Humor. Hari ini dosennya memberikan penugasan yaitu sebuah paper 6-10 halaman berdasarkan bacaan dan refleksi pengalaman hidup pribadi; semoga saya bisa mengerjakan dan menyelesaikannya di akhir kuliah ini di hari Jumat nanti. Sore hari setelah makan malam, saya kerokan sendiri di kamar karena merasa sedikit pusing dan tidak enak badan. Pagi-pagi buta Alejandro dan Chuy terbang ke Mexico untuk berlibur.
Rabu, 16 Juni 2004. Pagi hari saya ikut kuliah dengan topik tentang emosi, seksualitas dan keluarga, lalu sepulangnya saya mencoba untuk memperbaiki sepeda warna biru yang saya ambil dari gereja Saint Therese beberapa bulan lalu dan kucoba pakai di Jalan State dan juga jalan di tepi danau Michigan. Semoga saya bisa memakainya untuk alat transportasi ke tempat kerasulan saya mulai semeter depan di jalan South Normal/28th dekat Chinatown, kira-kira 6 miles jaraknya dari sini. Hari ini saya memasak soup ayam, nasi dan lasagna.
Kamis, 17 Juni 2004. Pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah dengan topik tentang tubuh dan kesehatan, intelek, fantasi dan kreativitas. Sore hari setelah istirahat siang saya mulai mengerjakan tugas paper untuk matakuliah Closer Look yang saya ambil minggu ini yaitu 10 halaman dan saya selesaikan malam hari. Pukul lima sore kami mengadakan adorasi atau sembah sujud sakramen mahakudus dipimpin oleh Pastor Rocco dimana Frater Petrus juga hadir dari Chinatown. Pastor Adolph baru kembali dari ziarah ke tanah suci Israel dan membagikan hadiah buat kami masing-masing sebuah rosario kecil dan menunjukkan sebuah patung kecil ‘perjamuan terakhir Yesus’dari kayu yang cukup indah yang dibelinya juga di Israel.
Jumat, 18 Juni 2004. Pagi ini pukul tujuh kurang seperempat kami mengadakan misa yang dipimpin oleh Pastor Victor dan dihadiri oleh Pastor Adolph dan saya sendiri. Pukul 7.30 hingga 8.30 kami melanjutkan dengan lectio divina bersama komunitas yang dipimpin pula oleh Pastor Victor. Saya menghadiri kuliah terakhir untuk minggu ini dan menyerahkan paper 10-halaman saya juga yang saya sharingkan juga untuk Anda sekalian namun di edisi bhs Inggrisnya, maaf tidak sempat menerjemahkan ke bhs Indonesia soalnya agak panjang juga. Setelah pulang ke rumah, saya pergi ke downtown Chicago untuk berbelanja pakaian di GAP dan berjalan sepanjang Jalan Michigan Avenue. Malam hari Sony, svd dan Gaby menjemputku untuk pergi ke rumah Budi-Rina di South State Street untuk ikut persekutuan doa yang kali ini dipandu renungan KS nya oleh Bapak Budi, tuan rumah bertemakan HARAPAN dan kami saling berbagi pengalaman iman dan saling mendoakan dan menguatkan. Lain dari biasanya, kali ini doa dilanjutkan dengan acara karaoke bersama hingga tengah malam.
Sabtu, 19 Juni 2004. Pagi hari pukul 7.15 seperti biasa saya mengikuti misa yang dipimpin oleh Pastor Victor (cuma kami berdua saja) lalu saya menelpon ke beberapa kerabat keluarga dan sahabat di Indonesia untuk mengucapkan salam dan beranjangsana saja lewat suara karena memang saya masih lama tinggal di USA ini, masih tiga tahun hingga 2007 baru rencana kembali ke Indonesia, maka yah baiklah saya masih kontak dengan mereka dengan sarana telepon kartu yang relatif murah, terjangkau dan mudah ini. Ini membuat tekad dan niatku untuk tidak pulang sebelum selesai studi saya semakin kuat saja, karena dari usa ini komunikasi dengan keluarga dan sahabat justeru malah lebih sering daripada waktu saya di Jakarta dulu. Dari telepon ini saya mendapatkan banyak informasi setidaknya dari Frater Purnomo, OFM yang bulan Juli akan ikrar kaul kekal bersama teman sekelas dia (Cypri, Bambang, Eko, Valen dan Bone) dan dari dia juga saya tahu bahwa Serikat Scalabrinian tidak lagi ada di Jakarta, mereka meindahkan seminari mereka ke Flores karena alasan ekonomi dan panggilan/intelektual. Baru saja setahun di Jakarta namun sudah pindah. Sore hari setelah cuci baju dan menyeterika serta istirahat siang, saya dengan sepeda pergi ke Chinatown dari rumah sekitar 30 menit melalui State Street. Naik sepeda bagi saya menyenangkan seperti hobi dan kebiasaanku di Jakarta dulu namun gak tahu nanti apakah saya dapat melakukannya di musim dingin, ktia lihat saja nanti. Petrus mengajakku untuk main tenis bersama Nolan juga dan ini adalah pengalaman pertama kali saya main tenis. Sebenarnya tempat main tenis ini dekat sekali dengan pusat spiritualitas David Dardst di Jalan 28 dan Normal Street. Malangnya, setelah main tenis, ban mobiln belakang bocor dan kaca jendela depannya rusak jatuh ke bawah (ini mobilnya Pastor Aniello yang sudah sering rusak). Malam hari hingga jam satu dini hari saya banyak bercerita dengan Petrus di ruang komputer paroki Chinatown.
Minggu, 20 Juni 2004. Saya tidur malam hari di pastoran gereja saint Therese Chinatown, di kamar Pastor Aniello lalu pagi hari jam 7.20 saya pergi ke rumah retret David Dardst tidak jauh dari gereja ini. Saya tersesat di jalan soalnya peta yang saya gambar keliru, seharusnya 28th street tapi saya tulis 18th street namun saya sadar bahwa nomor rumah retret ini adalah 2834 jadi artinya terletak di 28th street. Rumah retret ini akan menjadi tempat kerasulan saya mulai September dari matakuliah Ministry Practicum sekolah teologi saya, CTU, selama setahun. Ada retret dari mudika paroki Santa Bernadeth, Appleton (Wisconsin) sekitar 16 orang. Saya bertemu dengan beberapa volunter yang tinggal dan membantu rumah retret ini yaitu David (paling tua dari Pennsylvania), George (Houston-Texas), Gayle (Missouri), Kelsea (Elgin-Chicago), Amy (New Jersey). Mereka menyambut dengan baik kehadiran saya di antara mereka meskipun baru pertama jumpa. Saya mengikuti kegiatan mereka, misa pukul 9 pagi di gereja katolik Santo Basilius di Jalan Garfield lalu ke Su Casa, sebuah rumah untuk para keluarga imigran khususnya dari Guatemala dan Nicaragua; rumah ini bekas sebuah biara fransiskan ordo ketiga dan sekarang jadi rumah untuk gerekan Catholic Worker (Dorothy Day). Kami makan siang di soup kitchen Su Casa ini di mana kami harus mengantri mengambil makan siang dulu di tepi jalan bersama beberapa orang African American lalu kami makan bersama di ruang makan rumah ini sambil mendengarkan sharing dari Freida, seorang wanita African American yang menjadi volunter membagi makanan bagi orang-orang yang datang. Ada sekitar 16 orang ikut retret ini, umur mereka sekitar 11 hingga 17 tahun dan semuanya orang bule. Kami pulang kembali ke rumah retret dan saya ngantuk sekali sambil baca majalah di ruang tamu. Saya bercakap-cakap dengan seorang volunter yaitu Gayle seorang gadis muda dari Missouri yang sudah selesai studi teologi di college dan ingin lanjut studi teologi di CTU. Pukul 4 sore kami sekali lagi pergi ke shelter untuk tuna wisma di Lakeview Shelter di gedung yang sama dengan gereja Lutheran Lakeview. Kami makan malam dan bermain kartu dan game lain bersama dengan para penghuni tempat ini yang kebanyakan adalah orang African American pria. Pukul 8 malam kami balik ke rumah retret. Pukul 9 kurang seperempat saya pamitan pulang ke rumah naik sepeda ke Hyde Park. Ini adalah hari yang sungguh indah penuh pengalaman baru buat saya, bagus untuk perkenalan pertama kali saya akan macam retret yang akan menjadi kegiatan kerasulan saya nantinya. Saya tertarik dengan anak-anak muda yang punya kepekaan akan masalah keadilan sosial dan perdamaian di masyarakat yang dipraktekkan dalam retret ini. Saya juga senang sekali karena dengan tempat kerasulan ini akan meningkatkan kepekaan sosial saya terhadap misi retret untuk keadilan dan damai sosial ini serta semoga saja meningkatkan bahasa Inggris saya khususnya karena saya bergaul dengan orang bule Amerika pembicara asli bhs Inggris ini. Semoga pula saya juga bisa menyumbangkan pengalaman saya sebagai seorang Asia diantara orang bule Amerika. Ini adalah benar-benar kerasulan lintas budaya dan ras yang nampaknya sudah merupakan pengalaman menjadi misionaris kecil-kecilan buat saya.