dennywahyudi

Friday, June 03, 2005

Sunday of Holy Family, December 26, 2004

4) Sunday of Holy Family, December 26, 2004

Monday, December 20, 2004. At 11 a.m. I met Richard McCarron, the professor of Sacraments II (Theology of Eucharist) at CTU to have the exit interview or oral exam for about thirty minutes. I raised one question that I have prepared, namely, that Christ Jesus in the Eucharist is truly, really and substantially present. With the gratitude finishing this Fall Semester 2004 at CTU, I went to Saint Peter Loop Church to have confession as my personal preparation as well to enter the Christmas 2004. On my way home, I met my classmate named Martin from the Claretian congregation and we talked to in the bus.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004. At night I wrote my experience living in the USA and sent it to the fourth graders of the Xaverian philosophy students in Jakarta via e-mail as well as Nyoman in Yogyakarta. Near to midnight, Petrus and Dharmawan brought two big boxes of Indonesian food from Philadelphia carried by Father Jack. I thank to Father Jack with his kindness bringing this stuff for us here in Chicago and my gratitude as well to Tatiana who has offered me something from Philadelphia and accomplished it generously. I heard that one of the foods called ‘rempeyek’ is used to be the food of an Indonesian singer from Surabaya-Indonesia named Atiek C.B.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004. In the morning we (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan, Pascal Junior and I) went to Saint Therese Church to help decorate the basement with Christmas ornament. We had lunch together with at the basement cooked by Father Michael. I had conversation also with Father Michael’s brother from Italy named Walter and his wife even though my vocabulary in Italian is very limited. There were Mr.Cecep and his wife and their son, Willy who just graduated from Purdue University, Indiana coming to Chinatown to visit us. They are parishioners of Toasebio church in Jakarta where the Xaverians work. This family also visited us at Hyde Park, our theology house. In the supper, Darlene from Chinatown parish joined us and gave us Chirstmas gift as usual. Thanks also to Darlene and Nicole, her daughter for their generosity. I contacted some families and friends in Indonesia via phone to envoy my greeting in this Christmas season.

Thursday, December 23, 2004. At 8.30 in the morning all of us went to a Franciscan retreat house at Frankport-Illinois to do our monthly retreat and this time Father Willy Mukucha, SX from Congo was preaching for us at this retreat with a topic taken from the beginning of John Gospel. In the evening we concluded our retreat with supper at Northwood Restaurant nearby the retreat house.

Friday, December 24, 2004. At noon there was a choir practice that was held by some Indonesian friends at the basement of our Xaverian house and we savored the food from Philadelphia as our menu of lunch. A quarter to two p.m. an Indonesian family from Buffalo Grove, Illinois came to visit me at Hyde Park. They were Steve-Monci’s family with their three children, Kalista, Thalia and Alen. It’s my pleasure and privilege to have them here and with their kindness as well they invited me to visit and stay at their house one night. Before we went to their house, they showed me Alexian Brothers Hospital complex which is located at Elk Grove Village where I plan to have CPE program for next summer. They treated me to have supper at a Japanese Restaurant that was awesome because we could see the cook demonstrated how to cook on a wide table in front of us. It such as an entertainment and it’s nice to see fire lighted up by the cook in front of us as he cooked for us. It’s my first time to have this kind of Japanese food. Coming back to this family’s house, we watched a video of their vacation in Indonesia last summer. I was impressed with their big family reunion. It’s a wonderful witness of a harmonious extended family that I have ever seen in my life like Psalm 133 mentions, “How very good and pleasant it is when kindred live together in unity…”

Saturday, December 25, 2004. In the morning at their house, we opened some gifts that were prepared by Monci for her three children and I got a lot of gifts also from them. Thank you once again for their kindness to me to have this experience joining their Christmas family. One thing that I have thought during the last two years living in the USA that is when I could visit an Indonesian family to celebrate a Christmas Day and this year 2004 my dream was accomplished. I don’t know how I repay their kindness to me. Then we altogether went to the Indonesian Christmas Mass at Saint Therese Chinatown Chicago. The Mass was started at 11.30 a.m. presided by Father Eko, CM and there were about 80 people coming to this Mass. We continued our Christmas celebration with lunch as usual at the basement then Dharmawan and Petrus presented their idea to the audience some songs and their improvisation together with two SVD’s deacon (Francis and Sony) and Xaverian students as well as two Indonesian priests, Father Jack, CM and Father Edi, OSC. It seemed that the audience enjoyed this event. For the first time also Harno, SX, a new Indonesian Xaverian language student from Franklin-Milwaukee came to our Indonesian Mass. Thank you also for our ‘mothers’ who have prepared and cooked the Indonesian food that we have eaten for this special celebration….they’re delicious and we will meet again next month on January 9th, 2005.
At our Xaverian theology community, we celebrated the Christmas with supper with special food prepared and cooked by Father Rocco since yesterday. We continued our celebration with the exchanging of gifts and sang the Silent Night in various languages such as English, Spanish, France, African languages, Indonesian and Javanese that reflected our diversity in our community. I felt that this night we happily enjoyed our togetherness as a religious community….bravo for the master of ceremony, Petrus who led this simple event.

Sunday, December 26, 2004. In the morning I had Mass at 8 at Saint Thomas Church then we (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan and I) together with Father Edi, osc and Father Jack, cm, went to visit some Indonesian families around the suburbs. We visited Manulang family, Pak Yudo family, Stephanus family and finally we concluded our visit at Whittemore family. Coincided with the Sunday of Holy Family that we celebrated today, it is proper to do this visit. We envoy our gratitude to all friends and families who have accepted us warmly and hospitable. We arrived home at 9 p.m.
Finally, I want to utter my greeting to all of you:
MERRY CHRISTMAS 25 December 2004 and
HAPPY NEW YEAR 01 January 2005
May God bless us all with new hopes and new days then see you next year….
Thank you for your friendship and patience to read my sharing during this year 2004 and I ask you pardon if I did something inconvenience to you.
Fraternally:
In faith-hope-love,
Denny Wahyudi, sx

4) Hari Minggu Pesta Keluarga Kudus, 26 Desember 2004

Senin, 20 Desember 2004. Pukul 11 pagi saya menemui dosen saya bernama Richard McCarron, dosen untuk matakuliah Sakramen II (Teologi Ekaristi) di CTU untuk ujian lisan selama 30 menit. Saya memilih sebuah pertanyaan tentang kehadiran nyata Yesus Kristus dalam Ekaristi: bahwa dalam Ekaristi Kristus secara sungguh-sungguh, secara benar-benar dan secara substantial hadir. Dengan mengucap syukur kepada Tuhan atas selesainya masa studi dalam semester musim gugur 2004 ini, saya pergi ke Gereja Santo Peter Loop downtown Chicago untuk menerima sakramen tobat sebagai persiapan pribadi dalam masa Advent menyongsong hari Natal 2004. Saat perjalanan pulang ke rumah, saya bertemu seorang teman sekelas di CTU dari tarekat Claretian bernama Martin dan kami berbincang di bis umum.

Selasa, 21 Desember 2004. Pada malam hari saya menulis pengalaman saya selama dua tahun hidup dan tinggal di USA sebagai frater SX dan kukirim lewat e-mail kepada para frater Xaverian tingkat IV di Wisma Xaverian Cempaka Putih Jakarta juga kepada Frater Nyoman di Yogyakarta. Menjelang tengah malam, Petrus dan Dharmawan membawa dua kardus besar berisi makanan Indonesia dari Philadelphia yang dibawa oleh Romo Jack, CM. Saya berterima kasih kepada Romo Jack yang telah sudi membawa pesanan ini bagi kami semua di Chicago ini dan juga rasa terima kasih saya yang mendalam untuk Ibu Tatiana di Philadelphia atas segala kebaikan dan perhatiannya pada saya dan memenuhi kerinduan saya untuk makan: ragi/srundeng, empal dan sambal serta bonusnya rempeyek. Saya mendengar bahwa salah satu makanan yaitu rempeyek ini adalah makanan favorit artis penyanyi asal Surabaya bernama Atiek C.B. kalau lagi konser di New York dan sekitarnya.

Rabu, 22 Desember 2004. Pagi hiar kami (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan, Pascal Junior dan I) pergi ke Gereja Santa Theresia untuk membantu mendekorasi ruang basement dengan hiasan Natal. Kami makan bersama di basement yang dimasak oleh Pastor Michael, SX. Dengan keterbatasan kosa kata bahasa Italia saya, saya berusaha bercakap dengan saudara Pastor Michael dari Italia yang sedang berkunjung di Chicago bersama dengan isterinya. Ada pula Pak Cecep bersama isterinya serta anaknya bernama Willy yang baru saja lulus kuliah di Universitas Purdue Indiana datang mengunjungi kami di Chinatown. Mereka adalah umat paroki Toasebio di Jakarta tempat Xaverian berkarya. Keluarga ini juga mengunjungi kami di rumah teologi kami di Hyde Park. Saat makan malam, Darlene dari gereja Saint Therese datang dan memberikan bingkisan Natal seperti biasa. Terima kasih untuk Darlene dan Nicole, puterinya atas kebaikan mereka. Saya menelpon beberapa teman dan keluarga di Indonesia untuk menyampaikan salam natal.
Kamis, 23 Desember 2004. Pukul 8.30 pagi hari kami semua pergi ke sebuah rumah retret Fransiskan di Frankport-Illinois untuk menjalani retret bulanan dan kali ini Pastor asal Congo bernama Willy Mukucha, SX memimpin retret ini dengan topik dari bab-bab awal Injil Yohanes. Sore harinya kami mengakhiri retret ini dengan makan malam bersama di sebuah restauran bernama Northwood dekat dengan tempat reteret ini.

Jumat, 24 Desember 2004. Siang hari ada satu latihan nyanyi yang diadakan oleh beberapa teman Indonesia di basemen rumah Xaverian-Hyde Park dan kami menikmati makan siang bersama dengan menu makanan dari Philadelphia yang sudah saya terima dan simpan sejak hari Selasa lalu. Pukul dua kurang seperempat sore, sebuah keluarga Indonesia dari Buffalo Grove, Illinois datang mengunjungi saya di Hyde Park. Mereka adalah keluarga Steve-Monci bersama ketiga anak-anak mereka yang lucu yaitu Kalista, Thalia dan Alen. Ini adalah suatu kebahagiaan dan keistimewaan tersendiri buat saya yang telah mengunjungi saya di sini dengan segala perhatian dan kebaikan mereka juga atas kesediaan mereka mengundang saya ke rumah mereka untuk berkunjung dan menginap semalam. Sebelum kami pergi ke rumah mereka, mereka menunjukkan Rumah Sakit Alexian Brothers yang berada di Elk Grove Village di mana saya merencanakan akan menjalani CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) musim panas 2005 nanti. Mereka mentraktir saya makan malam bersama di sebuah restaran Jepang yang sungguh menarik buat saya sebab kami dapat melihat tukang masaknya mendemonstrasikan cara masak di meja lebar di hadapan kami. Ini seperti semacam pertunjukkan dan sungguh indah melihat api menyala tinggi diperagakan oleh kokinya ketika ia memasak. Ini adalah kali pertamanya buat saya makan di sebuah restauran Jepang semacam ini. Pulang kembali ke rumah keluarga ini, kami menonton sebuah video hasil liburan mereka di Indonesia musim panasa lalu. Saya sungguh terkesan dengan acara reuni keluarga yang mereka adakan di Indonesia. Ini suatu teladan yang bagus dan indah sekali dari sebuah keluarga besar yang cukup harmonis yang pernah saya saksikan seperti kata Mazmur 133 mentions, “Betapa indah dan menyenangkan ketika sesama saudara hidup bersama dalam kesatuan….”

Sabtu, 25 Desember 2004. Pagi hari di rumah mereka, kami membuka kado-kado Natal yang sudah disiapkan oleh Monci untuk ketiga anak tercintanya dan saya pun kebagian kado-kado dari mereka. Saya ucapkan rasa terima kasih saya yang mendalam sekali lagi atas segala kebaikan mereka kepada saya mengalami kebersamaan dalam acara Natal keluarga mereka. Satu hal yang sejak dua tahun terakhir ini kuidamkan saat tinggal di USA ini adalah dapat mengunjungi keluarga Indonesia di Chicago untuk merayakan hari Natal dan di tahun 2004 ini rupanya impian dan agan saya terpenuhi. Saya tidak tahu bagaimana saya dapat membalas kebaikan mereka semua. Lalu kami bersama pergi ke misa Natal Indonesia di Gereja Santa Theresia di Chinatown Chicago. Misa dimulai sekitar pukul 11.30 pagi dipimpin oleh Romo Eko, CM dan ada sekitar 80 umat hadir dalam misa ini. Kami lanjutkan acara ramah tamah di basemen dengan makan siang bersama lalu Frater Dharmawan dan Petrus mempersembahkan ide kreatif mereka kepada para permirsa dengan lagu-lagu daerah dengan improvisasi mereka sendiri bersama dengan dua frater diakon SVD (Francis dan Sony) dan juga frater Xaverian lainnya (Ignas, Harno dan saya sendiri) serta dua romo Jack, CM dan Romo Edi, OSC. Nampaknya umat sekalian menikmati acara langka ini. Untuk kali pertamanya Frater Harno, SX (frater yang lagi belajar bahasa Inggris di Milwaukee) mengikuti misa Indonesia PWKI Chicago ini. Terima kasih juga pada para ‘ibu’ yang telah mempersiapkan makanan istimewa untuk Natalan ini….tanpa mereka pasti Natalan tak akan berkesan alias lapar…sampai jumpa lagi di misa berikutnya di tahun depan 9 Januari 2005.
Di komunitas teologi SX kami, kami merayakan natalan bersama dengan makan malam yang sudah disiapkan sejak hari Jumat dan dimasak oleh Pastor Rocco. Kami lanjutkan acara tukar kado dan menyanyikan lagu Malam Kudus dalam berbagai bahasa seperti: Inggis, Spanyol, Afrika, Indonesia dan Jawa yang merefleksikan keberagaman kami di komunitas ini. Saya merasakan malam ini kami dengan gembira menikmati kebersamaan ini sebagai sebuah keluarga religius….selamat untuk pembuat acara alias MC, Frater Petrus yang dengan sederhana penuh makna memandu acara ini.

Minggu, 26 Desember 2004. Pagi hari saya mengikuti misa di gereja Santo Thomas pukul 8 lalu kami (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan dan saya sendiri) bersama pula dengan Romo Edi, osc dan Romo Jack, cm pergi mengadakan kunjungan keluarga Indonesia di sekitar suburb/pinggiran kota Chicago. Kami mengunjungi empat kelaurga yaitu: Keluarga Pak Manulang, keluarga Pak Yudo, keluarga Stephanus dan akhirnya kami mengakhiri silaturahmi seharian ini di rumah keluarga Whittemore. Bertepatan dengan hari Minggu Pesta Keluarga Kudus hari ini, memang tepatlah mengadakan program kunjungan keluarga sekedar silaturahmi ini. Kami menyampaikan syukur dan terima kasih kami kepada teman dan keluarga sekalian yang kami kunjungi hari ini yang telah menerima kami dengan hangat dan penuh kekeluargaan. Kami sampai rumah di Hyde Park sudah jam 9 malam.
Akhirnya pula, saya mengucapkan:
SELAMAT HARI NATAL 25 Desember 2004 dan
TAHUN BARU 01 Januari 2005
Kiranya Allah senantiasa memberikan berkat bagi kita semua dengan harapan-harapan dan hari-hari baru, sampai bersua lagi di tahun yang akan datang. Terima kasih atas segala persahabatan dan kesabaran teman sekalian yang telah menyempatkan waktu membaca sharing saya selama tahun 2004 ini dan mohon maaf bila ada sesuatu yang tidak berkenan di hati. Salam persahabatan dari saya:
Dalam iman-harapan-kasih,
Denny Wahyudi, sx

4th Sunday of Advent, December 19, 2004

3) 4th Sunday of Advent, December 19, 2004

Monday, December 13, 2004. In the morning I had a short colloquium with Father Rocco. After Sacraments I class, I met Father Gil Ostdiek, OFM, my academic advisor, asking about Canon Law course at J-term. I should take this course partly especially in the session of Sacrament of Penance that I did not received yet when I studied it in Indonesia. In the afternoon from 1 to 2.15 I attended the last class of Sacraments II taught by Richard McCarron. I will have an oral exam of this course on next Monday at 11 a.m. about the Eucharistic Theology. I started to finish my final paper of Spirituality.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004. The whole morning till afternoon I finished up my final paper of spirituality. In the afternoon I attended the last class of Interreligious Dialogue in Asia taught by Edmund Chia. The first part we had evaluation of this course and submitted the final exam. The second part we watched some videocassettes of Interreligious Dialogue in Asia. For the first time I watched Seimeizan interreligious Dialogue in Japan in which a Xaverian Italian priest, Franco Sottocornola lives together with a Buddhist monk and some other members of their community which is located in the peak of mountain. I have heard a lot about him and seen his picture and now I get to know his ministry in Japan. My professor, Chia had been visiting this place and he’s very impressed with the beauty of the nature and the program of this interreligious dialogue in Seimeizan, Japan. We watched also two Maryknoll missions in Thailand and Bangladesh: one Maryknoll priest has a ministry among the Buddhist monk in Thailand. The other Maryknoll priest, named Father Bob whom I met him last summer at CTU, works and lives in Bangladesh among the poor Muslim neighborhood. I was impressed as well with his style of life that was the same simplicity on the film as well as his actual appearance when I met him at CTU during my summer classes 2004. He rode a bicycle on the streets of Bangladesh villages and helped people who have problem in their daily lives. After coming home and talking about him with Dharmawan, then Dharmawan told me that Father Bob had been in Franklin-Milwaukee visiting Father Dominic, SX, who also ever had mission also in Bangladesh.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004. In the morning Wawan and I had the last class of Sacraments I with Richard Fragomeni as the professor in which we also had to submit our final paper about RCIA. Today also I still tried to finish my final paper of Spirituality for tomorrow morning and finally in the evening I printed it out, 23-page paper with the title: Saint Augustine’s conversion on the Book VIII of Confession for the Catechumens. In the supper we celebrated the 55-year birthday of our rector, Father Rocco Puopolo, SX and this time also Ignas cooked for us. I remember also that today in Jakarta is already December 16th and I called up my second older sister to congratulate her 32nd birthday and she told me that she is conceiving her third child in the second month. She hopes that this time she will have a son since the first and the second ones are girls.

Thursday, December 16, 2004. In the morning I attended the last class of foundation and method of study spirituality (Mary Frohlich) and submitted my final paper. Father Victor Mosele, SX and a young guest named Peter from Champagne-Illinois visited our community here. At night I was watching a DVD of Gospel of John.

Friday, December 17, 2004. The whole day I stayed at house to study theology of Eucharist for final oral exam on next Monday. In the afternoon I got a phone call from a supervisor of CPE of Alexian Brothers Health System, named James Gullickson and he told me that about two weeks he will invite me to have interview regard my summer Clinical Pastoral Education 2005. In the afternoon I cooked for our community here: two different kind of soups (rawon and sayur asin/baikut).

Saturday, December 18, 2004. In the morning I did clean some places of this house, basement and the third floor. In the evening we did novena of Christmas at our chapel. At night I wrote some birthday cards to be sent to some family and friends in Indonesia. From the SX Flesh I read that the Indonesian Xaverian province has a website: http://xaverindo.org then I tried to search it. Congratulation to Father Otello Pancani, SX for this great job.

Sunday, December 19, 2004. I had a Mass at Saint Thomas church at 10 a.m. and we (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan, one friend from DeKalb and I) visited Syafa at her apartment and Syafa offered us lunch. After took a rest a while I continued to study of theology of Eucharist, especially in the question on: the meaning of Christ is truly, really and substantially presents in the Eucharist for tomorrow oral exam at CTU at 11 a.m.

3) Hari Minggu Advent Keempat, 19 Desember 2004

Senin, 13 Desember 2004. Pagi hari saya bertemu rektor saya, Pastor Rocco untuk colloquium. Setelah kuliah sakramen I saya bertemu Pastor Gil Ostdiek, OFM, penasehat akademik saya di CTU untuk menanyakan kuliah Hukum Gereja di bulan Januari nanti. Saya harus mengambil matakuliah ini sebagian khususnya materi tentang sakramen rekonsiliasi yang menurut hemat saya belum pernah saya dapat ketika studi teologi di Jakarta-Indonesia. Di sore hari dari jam 1 hingga 2.15 saya ikut kuliah terakhir Sakramen II yang diajar oleh Richard McCarron. Saya akan mengikuti ujian lisan dalam kuliah ini hari Senin depan pukul 11 tentang Teologi Ekaristi. Saya mulai menyelesaikan tugas paper akhir saya untuk kuliah Spiritualitas.

Selasa, 14 Desember 2004. Sepanjang pagi dan sore hari saya mengerjakan tugas paper akhir spiritualitas. Sore hari saya mengikuti kuliah terakhir Dialog Antaraagama di Asia yang diajar oleh Edmund Chia. Bagian pertama kelas ini kami mengadakan evaluasi dan mengumpulkan ujian akhir yang kami kerjakan di rumah dalam waktu seminggu terakhir ini. Bagian kedua kami menonton tiga film tentang dialog antar agama di Asia. Untuk kali pertamanya saya menonton video tentang dialog antaragama Seimeizan di Jepang di mana seorang pastor Xaverian asal Italia yang bernama Franco Sottocornola tinggal bersama dengan seorang biksu Buddha dan beberapa anggota komunitas lain termasuk suster biarawati yang memiliki tempat di puncak gunung. Saya pernah mendengar banyak hal tentang misi Xaverian di Jepang ini namun hanya melalui cerita dan photo dan kini saya mengetahui lebih jelas karya kerasulan pastor SX ini di Jepang. Dosen saya, Chia pernah mengunjungi tempat ini dan ia sungguh terkesan dengan keindahan dan keasrian tempat ini dan juga program dialog di Seimeizan, Jepang ini. Kami menonton dua film lain tentang misi tarekat Maryknoll di Thailand dan Bangladesh: satu pastor Maryknoll memiliki sebuah karya kerasulan di antara para bhiksu Buddha di Thailand. Seorang pastor Maryknoll lainnya bernama Pastor Bob yang pernah saya jumpai di CTU musim panas lalu, bekerja dan tinggal di Bangladesh di antara kaum Muslim yang cukup miskin. Saya berkesan juga dengan gaya hidup pastor asal Amerika ini yang sama sederhananya ketika saya lihat di film begitu pula ketika saya melihat penampilan luarnya ketika bertemu dia dalam kuliah musim panas 2004 di CTU. Dalam film ia mengayuh sepeda untanya (seperti sepeda saya dulu di Jakarta) di jalan-jalan desa Bangladesh dan membantu penduduk setempat yang menghadapi masalah kesehatan dan kemiskinan dalam hidup keseharian mereka. Setelah saya pulang ke rumah dan berbincang dengan Dharmawan, lalu Dharmawan cerita padaku bahwa Pastor Bob ini pernah berkunjung ke komunitas Xaverian di Franklin-Milwaukee mengunjungi Pastor Dominic, SX yang juga pernah bertugas di Bangladesh.

Rabu, 15 Desember 2004. Pagi hari Wawan dan saya mengikuti kuliah Sakramen I dengan dosennya Richard Fragomeni di mana kami juga harus menyerahkan paper terakhir kami tentang RCIA (katekumenat). Hari ini juga saya masih mencoba untuk menyelesaikan paper akhir saya dalam matakuliah Fondasi dan Metode dalam studi Spiritualitas untuk esok pagi dan akhirnya saya dapat mencetaknya, 23 halaman dengan judul: Pertobatan Santo Agustinus dalam buku VIII Confession untuk para katekumen di Indonesia. Saat makan malam kami merayakan hari ultah rektor kami yang ke-55, Pastor Father Rocco Puopolo, SX dan kali ini Ignas memasak untuk komunitas. Saya ingat juga bahwa hari ini di Jakarta sudah tanggal 16 Desember dan saya menelpon kakak perempuan saya kedua untuk mengucapkan hari ultahnya ke-32 dan ia bercerita padaku bahwa ia sedang mengandung di bulan keduanya. Ia berharap mendapatkan anak ketiganya ini laki-laki karena anak pertama dan kedua adalah cewek yang sudah berusia 4 dan 6 tahun, Febbe dan Kezia.

Kamis, 16 Desember 2004. Pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah terakhir untuk matakuliah fondasi dan metode study spirituality yang diajar oleh Mary Frohlich, RSCJ dan menyerahkan paper akhir 22 halaman tentang pertobatan Santo Agustinus. Pastor Victor Mosele, SX dengan seorang muda dari Champagne-Illinois bernama Peter mengunjungi komunitas kami di sini. Malam hari saya menonton DVD tentang Injil Yohanes.

Jumat, 17 Desember 2004. Sepanjang hari saya tinggal di rumah untuk mempersiapkan diri ujian lisan teologi Ekaristi di hari Senin depan. Sore hari saya dapat telepon dari supervisor CPE Alexian Brother Alexian Brothers Health System bernama James Gullickson dan ia memberikan pesan bahwa sekitar dua minggu mendatang saya akan diundangnya untuk wawancara sehubungan dengan program Clinical Pastoral Education untuk musim panas 2005 selama 3 bulan untuk memenuhi matakuliah Ministry Practicum II dari CTU. Sore hari saya memasak untuk komunitas saya di sini, dua macam sup: rawon dan sayur asin/baikut.

Sabtu, 18 Desember 2004. Pagi hari saya membersihkan basement dan juga lantai tiga. Sore hari kami berdoa novena Natal di kapel. Malam hari saya menulis beberapa kartu natal untuk siap dikirim ke keluarga dan teman di Indonesia. Dari SX Flesh siang ini saya baca bahwa propinsi Xaverian Indonesia sudah memiliki webstie sendiri yaitu: http://xaverindo.org lalu saya coba membukanya. Selamat untuk Pastor Otello Pancani, SX atas karya agungnya ini.

Minggu, 19 Desember 2004. Saya mengikuti misa di gereja Santo Thomas pukul 10 pagi dan kami (Petrus, Ignas, Dharmawan, seorang teman dari DeKalb dan saya sendiri) mengunjungi Syafa di apartemennya dan ia menawari makan siang dengan menu istimewa: ikan asin. Setelah isitirahat sejenak saya melanjutkan lagi studi teologi ekaristi, khususnya menjawab pertanyaan tentang: arti Kristus benar, sungguh dan secara substansial hadir dalam Sakramen Ekaristi untuk ujian lisan besok pagi jam 11 di CTU dengan dosennya Richard McCarron.

4th Sunday of Advent, December 19, 2004

3rd Sunday of Advent, December 12, 2004

2) 3rd Sunday of Advent, December 12, 2004

Monday, December 06, 2004. In the morning I had a class of Sacrament I in which we learned about Sacrament of Penance. The professor named Fragomeni told us that today was the day of giving a gift in accord of Saint Nicholas feast, so he gave us free from evening class which was supposed for the Rite of Penance I had to participate. At night I was doing my final paper of Interreligious Dialogue and preparing my power point presentation of Saint Augustine’s conversion.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004. Almost the whole day it was raining. In the morning Father Rocco and I went to CTU to have 4-way evaluation of my M.Div ministry course at 10 a.m. at Weber’s room in the library. We called 4-way because we were 4 persons who met at this forum, namely, the professor (Father Mark, SVD), my formator (Father Rocco, SX), my supervisor at the ministry site (Sister Paula, OSF) and myself. It only took for 20 minutes and generally I have a good evaluation and need to improve my role in the ministry next semester at David Darst Center such as giving session at one retreat. In my room I was preparing my power point presentation of Saint Augustine’s presentation. In the afternoon I sent via e-mail my final paper of Interreligious Dialogue to the professor, Edmund Chia.

Wednesday, December 08, 2004. Today was a solemnity of Immaculate Mary and we started our day with community morning prayer at 7.30 at the chapel and we had Mass at CTU at 4.30 p.m. The Mass called Misa PanaMaria was held by OLA (Latin American Group at CTU) and concelebrated by Father Gilberto, OFM. The bilingual Mass both Spanish and English lasted 1.5 hour. There were a lot of images of Mary in pictures and statues seemed as decoration at this Mass. We had supper house and Father Ivan visited us and directly returned to Milwaukee at night. I was still preparing myself for the presentation of my course in spirituality tomorrow morning.

Thursday, December 09, 2004. From 8.30 to 11.15 a.m. I had a class of Methods and Foundations of Study Spirituality in which I presented my power point presentation of the Conversion of Saint Augustine in appropriation to catechumenate process. At 5 p.m. I led our community adoration/Holy Hour in which I chose a topic of Open to the World and I read a letter of Father Paulin, SX from China whom I received his e-mail reply on March 31, 2004. In the supper, we celebrated simply the graduation of Father Pascal from his MA study. At 7.30 to 9.45 p.m. we had a community meeting with topic of Ministry and each one of us shared our experience. I appreciated this event as proposed by the formators in accord to our Community Project of Life that I missed last year. It helped me know other’s struggle in their ministry and enrich each other in a missionary spirit as one family in the Xaverian theology community.

Friday, December 10, 2004. Today I remained stay at home to do my final paper of Sacraments I and Sacraments II.

Saturday, December 11, 2004. Today I did my five-question final exam of Interreligious Dialogue. In the evening a Congolese Xaverian priest named Willy Mukucha arrived at our community from Rome and he will take part of IRF (Institute of Religious Formation) program at CTU for one year.

Sunday, December 12, 2004. We attended Indonesian Mass at Saint Therese School-Chinatown at 11 a.m. presided by Father Jack, CM. There were about 45 people attending this Mass. Before having lunch, we celebrated those who have birthday in December including Ignas and Dharmawan. After having lunch, Indonesian food, Mbak Erna and Gaby took us (Ignas, Dharmawan and me) home at Hyde Park.

2) Hari Minggu Advent Ketiga, 12 Desember 2004

Senin, 06 Desember 2004. Di pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah Sakramen I di mana kami belajar tentang Sakramen Tobat. Dosen kami bernama Fragomeni memberikan kabar gembira di kelas ini bahwa hari ini adalah hari Pesta Santo Nicholas, hari untuk pemberian hadiah, maka ia memberikan kami hadiah untuk bebas di sore hari yang seharusnya kami memiliki upacara liturgi tobat bersama di mana saya juga harus berpartisipasi seperti direncanakan semula. Malam hari saya mengerjakan paper akhir Dialog Antaragama dan menyiapkan presentasi dengan power point program untuk matakuliah spiritualitas dengan teman pertobatan Santo Agustinus.

Selasa, 07 Desember 2004. Hampir sepanjang hari hujan terus-menerus. Di pagi hari Pastor Rocco dan saya pergi ke CTU untuk menghadiri evaluasi 4 arah untuk matakuliah saya bernama M.Div Ministry Practicum pukul 10 di ruang Weber yang terletak di perpustakaan lantai tiga. Dinamakan 4-arah karena kami yang bertemu adalah empat orang yaitu dosen untuk matakuliah ini (Pastor Mark, SVD), rektor saya sendiri sebagai formator (Pastor Rocco, SX), supervisor saya di tempat kerasulan David Darst Center (Suster Paula, OSF) dan saya sendiri. Pertemuan sederhana ini hanya berlangsung selama 20 menit dan umumnya saya mendapatkan penilaian baik dan masih perlu meningkatkan peran saya di lahan kerasulan ini untuk semester berikutnya tahun depan di David Darst/ rumah retret seperti memberikan sesi dalam sebuah retret. Di kamar saya sendiri saya mempersiapkan lagi presentasi matakuliah spiritualitas Santo Agustinus. Sore hari saya mengirimkan paper akhir saya dalam matakuliah Dialog Antargama ke dosen asal Malaysia yang bernama Edmund Chia.

Rabu, 08 Desember 2004. Hari ini adalah Hari Pesta Maria dikandung tanpa noda dosa dan kami mengawali hari kami dengan doa bersama komunitas pukul 7.30 di kapel dan kami menghadiri misa khusus di CTU pukul 4.30 sore. Misa ini yang diberi nama PanaMaria diselenggarakanoleh organisasi Latin Amerika di CTU yang disebut OLA dan dipimpin oleh Pastor Gilberto, OFM. Misa dalam dua bahasa Inggris dan Spanyol ini berakhir selama 1,5 jam. Ada banyak gambar dan photo Bunda Maria dalam dekorasi ruangan untuk misa ini. Kami makan malam di komunitas dan ada Pastor Ivan, provinsial SX di USA mengunjungi kami dan malam ini juga dia pulang kembali ke Milwaukee. Malam hari saya masih mempersiapkan diri untuk presentasi kuliah spiritualitas untuk esok pagi.

Kamis, 09 Desember 2004. Dari pukul 8.30 hingga 11.15 pagi saya mengikuti kuliah Metode dan Fondasi dalam studi Spiritualitas di mana saya memberikan presentasi dengan power point untuk kali pertamanya tentang pertobatan Santo Agustinus dalam buku VIII dari buku berjudul Confession/Pengakuan dengan penerapannya pada proses katekumenat. Pukul 5 sore saya bertugas memandu adorasi/sembah sujud dalam komunitas di mana saya memilih tema Terbuka pada Dunia dan saya membacakan sebuah surat dari Pastor Paulin, SX dari China yang pernah saya kirimi surat dan saya menerima balasan e-mailnya 9 bulan lalu tertanggal 31 Maret 2004. Saat makan malam, kami merayakan secara sederhana kelulusan Pastor Pascal dari studi MA nya di CTU. Dari pukul 7.30 hingga 9.45 malam kami mengadakan pertemuan komunitas dengan topik ‘Ministry’/kerasulan dan kami masing-masing mensharingkan pengalaman kerasulan kami. Saya menghargai kemajuan yang dicapai dalam komunitas kami di sini dan hasil prakarsa para formator di sini bahwa kami memiliki waktu untuk bicara bersama tentang dimensi kerasulan yang memang saya rindukan tahun lalu sesuai dengan program hidup bersama kami tahun ini. Ini membantu saya mengetahui perjuangan para sesama konfrater di sini dalam karya kerasulan mereka serta saling memperkaya satu sama lain dalam semangat misioner sebagai satu keluarga di komunitas teologi Xaverian di Chicago ini.

Jumat, 10 Desember 2004. Hari ini saya tetap tinggal di rumah mengerjakan tugas paper terakhir untuk matakuliah Sakramen I dan Sakramen II.

Sabtu, 11 Desember 2004. Hari ini saya mengerjakan ujian akhir lima-soal untuk matakuliah Dialog Antaragama yang dikumpulkan hari Selasa depan. Di sore hari, seorang pastor muda Xaverian asal Congo bernama Willy Mukucha tiba di komunitas kami dari Roma dan akan mengambil kursus selama setahun di program IRF (Institute of Religious Formation) di CTU.

Minggu, 12 Desember 2004. Kami menghadiri misa Indonesia di sekolah Santa Theresia-Chinatown pukul 11 pagi dipimpin oleh Romo Jack, CM. Ada sekitar 45 orang hadir dalam misa kali ini. Sebelum makan siang dirayakan perayaan ulang tahun bagi mereka yang berultah bulan Desember termasuk Frater Ignas dan Dharmawan. Setelah makan siang makanan Indonesia (nasi, ayam, sayur lodeh, kacang dan teri serta sambal dan empek-empek, juga kolak) kami diantar pulang ke Hyde Park oleh Mbak Erna dan Gaby.

2nd Sunday of Advent, December 05, 2004

1) 2nd Sunday of Advent, December 05, 2004

Monday, November 29, 2004. In the morning at 10 a.m. I attended the class of Sacraments I in which at this time an associate professor named Aileen Crowley gave us a session about the celebration of sacraments of Initiations (Baptism-Confirmation-Eucharist) with showing her video-cassette, produced by herself in 1992 on the Vigil Easter that took place in a parish in Pasadena-Texas. We watched it at the class attentively and for the first time I saw a confirmation rite took place after the immersion baptism in which the priest poured out oil of chrism on the head of neophytes (newly baptized) then he rubbed the oil on the whole head. It was just abundant symbols both water and oil. It reminded me when I received the baptism on the 24 December 1990 (16 year-old) and the confirmation in 1991 with minimal water and oil. As I watched and was struck by this celebration, I thought that it doesn’t mean that grace of sacraments that I received was less than one who received abundantly water and oil. From the RCIA course, I could learn many things that I never knew before especially periods and steps also rites for catechumenate process even though I underwent and involved in a such thing in the catechumenate ministry in Jakarta-Indonesia but it’s not that complete like I learn of this class. In one side I think it’s just repetition what I have done but on the other side I learn the law and intact process of what we name in the USA with RCIA (Rites of Christian Initiation of Adults), but it does not stand for Roman Catholic In America.

Tuesday, November 30, 2004. In the morning I had a theological reflection in SVD’s house and it’s the last time we met as a group in this Fall Semester and we meet again on February 8, 2005 in the Spring Semester. At 2.20 p.m. Ignas drove me to my ministry site, David Darst Center in order to meet my supervisor of ministry, Sister Paula, OSF to ask her signature on my Ministry Practicum evaluation course while the day was raining incessantly. At night I had Interreligious Dialogue class and it’s the last class that we presented our weekly paper then we will meet again at the last class on December 14 while I have to finish my final paper and final exam which will be sent via e-mail next week. At night I read and learned about RCIA course.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004. Before going to CTU, I read once again about the Sacraments I (RCIA course) since we had a final test for this RCIA course with 21 questions in which 10 of them were the same questions that he gave us in the early course. We have done with the RCIA matter and next week we start with Rite of Penance till the end of this semester. In the afternoon and night I spent my precious time with typing this journal and doing my Interreligious Dialogue final paper. Since in Indonesia right now is already on December 2nd, so I called up Father Geremia, SX in the Xaverian philosophy house in Jakarta to give congratulation for his birthday. He gave me a message to give salutation to Dharmawan by tomorrow for his birthday as well at the same date with him.

Thursday, December 02, 2004. In the morning I attended a class of Spirituality in which there were four students presented their part of final paper and I have to do so next week. The whole afternoon I was trying to use power point in the computer for this presentation next week; it’s the first time I will be using it and hopefully it works since I saw one student used a floppy disk for her presentation today. After the Holy Hour led by Dharmawan, we had supper and celebrated 28th year birthday of Dharmawan. In the community meeting that lasted for one hour, Father Victor gave us some of his researched-teachings about Lectio Divina in a community then comparing the method of Benedictine and Jesuit. It seemed that this spiritual practice is emphasized in the Xaverian formation that is not beneficial for us as religious persons but also for our ministry for the faithful in our ministry now and the future.

Friday, December 03, 2004. Today is the feast of Saint Francis Xavier in which nothing special except the Mass in the morning presided by Father Victor lasted in one hour dedicated to this special feast. From 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. I attended a Pearls and Treasures Workshop at CTU with the topic of Personnel Issues. In the evening Ignatius and Dharmawan took me to my ministry site, David Darst Center then I spent my weekend at this retreat house. Starting on Thursday night, a group of the retreat from the Edgewood Catholic High School in Madison, Wisconsin comprised of seven junior students and two teachers had a weekend retreat. All prayer was led by the students with their creativity.

Saturday, December 04, 2004. In the morning I helped Sister Paula and Gayle prepare breakfast for the retreatans, prayed together at the chapel then we visited Hyde Park Kenwood Interfaith Council Food Pantry to volunteer some little works. In the afternoon, we visited a youth center and accompanying children mostly African-American youth playing games. At 5 p.m. we went back to the retreat center and I helped Sister Paula and Gayle prepare dinner. We had discussion about our experience today at night session.

Sunday, December 05, 2004. After having breakfast, all the retreatans volunteered cleaning the retreat house in the different posts as they chose yesterday before they leave this center. At 11 a.m. we had Mass at the SPRED chapel close to the retreat house. It’s the second time I came to this place that is used for mentally disabled Catholic faithful in Archdiocese of Chicago every first Sunday in a month. The retreat was closed by the teachers with prayer at the David Darst’s chapel. At 1 p.m. I headed to Hyde Park by CTA and continued to do my last two weeks studying at CTU for this Fall Semester. At night after evening prayer, I was invited by Petrus to attend his Mass practicing at Saint Therese Church Chinatown for his presiding course of CTU. It was attended also by some Indonesian friends and some Xaverian brothers.

1) Hari Minggu Advent Kedua, 05 Desember 2004

Senin, 29 November 2004. Di pagi hari pukul 10 saya mengikuti kuliah Sakramen I di mana kali ini Aillen Crowley, dosen rekanan memberikan kuliah tentang perayaan sakramen Inisiasi (Baptis-Krisma-Ekaristi) dengan mempertunjukkan sebuah kaset video hasil produksi dia sendiri di malam Paskah tahun 1992 yang mengabil tempat di sebuah gereja Katolik di Pasadena-Texas. Kami menontonnya di kelas dengan penuh perhatian dan untuk kali pertamanya saya melihat suatu ritual untuk sakramen Krisma diadakan setelah pembaptisan selam di mana pastor/pemimpin upacara menuangkan minyak krisma di kepala ‘neophtyes’/baptisan baru lalu pastor ini menjamah kepala baptisan baru ini dengan meratakan minyak yang berlimpah ini di seluruh kepala sampai menetes ke dahi, mata, wajah, wah pokoknya rata semua penuh minyak. Ini sungguh mandi/keramas minyak, berlimpah ruah minyak dan juga air di kolam untuk pembaptisan sebelumnya. Ini semua mengingatkan pada upacara pembaptisan saya pada tanggal 24 Desember 1990 (16 tahun) dan juga sakramen krisma saya di tahun 1991 di Madiun dengan simbol air dan minyak yang minim, tidak seperti di video ini. Ketika saya menonton video ini dan kagum pada perayaan ini, saya berpikir bahwa hal ini tidak berarti bahwa rahmat sakramen yang saya terima ketika saya menerima sakramen baptis dan krisma dengan kuantitas jauh lebih sedikit dalam hal air dan minyak adalah kurang dari seorang yang menerima simbol air dan minyak ini dengan berlimpah. Dari kuliah RCIA ini, saya dapat belajar banyak hal yang saya tidak pernah ketahui sebelumnya khususnya tentang periode dan tahap-tahap dalam proses katekumenat ini kendati saya mengalami dan terlibat dalam hal semacam ini dengan kerasulan di bidang katekumenat di Jakarta-Indonesia namun apa yang kualami tidaklah selengkap yang saya pelajari di kuliah ini. Di satu pihak saya berpikir kuliah ini hanyalah pengulangan dari apa yang sudah saya alami sendiri namun di sisi lain saya mempelajari aturan resmi/hukum yang ditentukan Gereja Katolik dengan ‘Editio Typica’ keluaran 1972 serta proses lengkap apa yang di Amerika Serikat ini disebut dengan RCIA (Rites of Christian Initiation of Adults = Ritual untuk Inisiasi orang dewasa), namun RCIA ini bukan kepanjangan dari Roman Catholic In America yang memang nampaknya proses RCIA di sini jauh lebih pelik dibandingkan di Indonesia sejauh pengalaman saya sendiri.

Selasa, 30 November 2004. Di pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah refleksi teologi di rumah SVD dan kali ini adalah terakhir kali kami bertemu bersama dalam kelompok ini dalam semester gugur ini dan kami akan bertemu lagi di semester semi tahun depan di tanggal 8 Februari. Pukul 2.20 sore Ignas mengantar saya ke David Darst Center, tempat kerasulan say untuk menemui supervisor saya, Suster Paula, OSF untuk minta tanda tangan darinya untuk evaluasi matakuliah Ministry Practicum I ini sementar di luar cuaca dingin dan hujan tiada henti-hentinya. Malm harinya saya ada kuliah dialog antaragama di CTU dan ini adalah kelas terakhir untuk presentasi mingguan lalu kami akan bertemu lagi di tanggal 14 Desember sementara saya harus menyelesaikan paper akhir saya untuk kuliah ini serta menunggu pertanyaan untuk ujian akhir melalui email minggu depan. Malam harinya saya belajar tentang RCIA.

Rabu, 01 Desember 2004. Sebelum pergi ke CTU, saya membaca sekali lagi tentang kuliah Sakramen I khususnya RCIA karena akan ada test akhir untuk bahan kuliah ini dengan pertanyaan berjumlah 21 buah di mana 10 pertanyaan pertama adalah pengulangan persis seperti yang telah kami terima di awal perkuliahan. Makam kami telah menyelesaikan bahan RCIA dan minggu depan kami memulai bahan lain berupa ritual untuk Sakramen Reksonsiliasi hingga akhir semester ini. Di sore dan malam hari ini saya menggunakan waktu berharga ini dengan mengetik jurnal ini dan membuat paper akhir saya untuk dialog antar agama. Karena di Indonesia saat ini sudah tanggal 2 Desember, maka saya menelpon ke Pastor Geremia, SX yang tepat berulang tahun ke-65 di Wisma Xaverian Filsafat-Jakarta, mengucapkan selamat buat mantan rektor filsafat saya dulu. Ia menitipkan pesan ucapan selamat pula pada saya untuk diberikan kepada Dharmawan yang juga berultah besok sama tanggalnya dengan Pastor Geremia.

Kamis, 02 Desember 2004. Di pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah spiritualitas di mana kali ini ada empat mahasiswa-i memberikan presentasi sebagian dari paper akhir mereka dan saya harus melakukan hal serupa di Kamis minggu depan. Seluruh sore saya habiskan untuk mencoba menggunakan program power point di komputer untuk presentasi spiritualitas saya minggu depan, semoga saja saya bisa menggunakannya soalnya saya melihat seorang mahasiswi menggunakan floopy disk untuk presentasinya hari ini. Setelah adorasi/sembah sujud yang dipandu oleh Dharmawan, kami makan malam bersama dan merayakan hari ulang tahun ke-28 untuk Frater Dharmawan. Dalam pertemuan komunitas di malam hari yang berlangsung selama satu jam, Pastor Victor memberikan sebagian hasil riset tentang Lectio Divina (meditasi Kitab Suci) di dalam komunitas lalu membandingkan metode olah rohani ini dengan tradisi Benediktin dan Jesuit. Nampaknya latihan rohani yang satu ini sungguh ditekankan dalam pembinaan para frater di tahap teologi yang tidak hanya memberikan manfaat bagi kami sebagai religius namun juga berguna untuk karya kerasulan kami sekarang ini dan kelak di kemudian hari untuk para umat yang (akan) kita layani.

Jumat, 03 Desember 2004. Hari ini adalah hari pesta Santo Fransiskus Xaverius, pelindung Serikat Misionaris Xaverian di mana tak ada hal istimewa di komunitas kami selain misa pagi hari di kapel dipimpin oleh Pastor Victor selama satu jam, diberikan perhatian khusus untuk hari istimewa ini. Dari pukul 9 pagi hingga 4 sore saya mengikuti workshop di CTU dengan tema Isue Personalia. Sore hari saya diantar Ignas dan Dharmawan ke tempat kerasulan saya di David Darst Center, dekat Chinatown Chicago dan saya tinggal di rumah retret ini di akhir pekan ini. Mulai hari Kamis malam, sebuah kelompok retret dari sekolah Katolik bernama Edgewood di Madison, Wisconsin yang terdiri dari 7 siswa-siswi dan dua guru mengadakan retret di tempat ini. Semua doa dipimpin oleh para peserta retret sendiri dengan kreativitas mereka masing-masing.

Sabtu, 04 Desember 2004. Pagi hari saya membantu Suster Paula dan Gayle (pelaksana retret ini) mempersiapkan sarapan bagi para peserta retret, lalu berdoa bersama di kapel dan mengunjungi sebuah tempat penampungan bahan makanan yang diperuntukkan bagi para kaum miskin yang membutuhkan, di sini disebut Hyde Park Kenwood Interfaith Council Food Pantry, membantu mengatur bahan-bahan makanan di gudang dan membagikannya untuk mereka yang datang, umumnya orang African-American. Tempatnya di basement Gereja Union, dekat gymnaisum Universitas Chicago. Sore harinya, kami mengunjungi sebuah pusat anak muda menemani bermain anak-anak yang mayoritas adalah African-American. Pukul 5 sore kami kembali ke rumah retret lalu kembali saya membantu menyiapkan makan malam. Kami mengadakan diskusi bersama di malam hari atas pengalaman selama sehari ini.

Minggu, 05 Desember 2004. Setelah makan pagi, semua peserta retret membantu membereskan dan membersihkan rumah retret ini sebelum mereka pulang meninggalkan rumah retret. Pukul 11 pagi kami menghadiri misa di SPRED chapel dekat dari rumah retret ini. Untuk kali kedua saya mengikuti misa di tempat ini yang digunakan secara khusus untuk orang cacad setiap hari Minggu pertama tiap bulan. Akhirnya retret ditutup dengan doa dan renungan oleh kedua guru mereka di kapel rumah retret. Pukul satu siang saya pun pulang kembali ke Hyde Park dengan kereta dan bis CTA dan melanjutkan kembali sisa kuliah saya di CTU dengan segala tugas-tugas akhirnya di dua minggu terakhir ke depan ini hingga 20 Desember. Malam hari setelah doa sore, saya diajak Petrus untuk menghadiri latihan misa di Gereja Santa Theresia Chinatown Chicago untuk matakuliah presidingnya di CTU. Misa ‘kayu’ ini juga dihadiri oleh beberapa teman Katolik Indonesia serta beberapa frater Xaverian.

1st Sunday of Advent, November 28, 2004

4) 1st Sunday of Advent, November 28, 2004

Monday, November 22, 2004. In the afternoon at the Founder’s room of CTU, I attended a class of Sacaraments II and this time the group I of the class presented one part of the Mass and we evaluated regard the Eucharistic Theology. After the class my group of this class practiced the second part of the Mass at the 6th floor chapel for next Wednesday class.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004. In the morning I had Theological Reflection class at the Claretian House and this time I presented my experience of ministry and the other members of the group contributed their opinions and insights based on this sharing. Hung, a Vietnamese Maryknoll student gave me information about the Japanese language website as we walked home. He told me about one of his OTP (Overseas Training Program for next year) choices is Japan then he gave me http://www.languageguide.org and after arrived home I tried this web and I saw not only Japanese language but also some other languages such as French, Italian, Spanish, Chinese, etc. It’s very fantastic tool to learn basic pronunciation of those language since it provides the voice pronunciation with some visual pictures.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004. Today is my 30th year birthday and last night I tried to see myself and to be grateful for life and grace I received from so many people especially my family, my religious family, the Xaverians and many other friends who have influenced and merit to me so that I am as I am now. I opened my photo album and I saw my family’s pictures especially my mother and father and other siblings, then I saw one picture depicted my first birthday at the Xaverian house in Bintaro when I celebrated my 22nd year of birthday and the rest of pictures deciphered my eight year journey of my life in the Xaverian formation. How wonderful it is to see all of these stages of life. Many people I have met during this life and journey of vocation in the Xaverian and all of them give special contribution to my life. I appreciate and thank to some people who congratulated me such as birthday cards I received from the Xaverian philosophy students in Jakarta and the Novitiate and Pre-Novitiate House in Jakarta, then Darlene in Saint Therese-Chinatown; also for the phone call of my good friend, Frans Slamet in NYC at midnight, Mother Oey in Jakarta early in the morning; birthday e-mail from Father Vincenzo, SX the provincial of SX in Indonesia, Harno in Milwaukee and Caroline in California, also Naning in Yogyakarta via sms-Internet. Thank you for your kindness and remembrance of me.
In the morning I was typing my paper of evaluation on my Ministry Practicum Class at CTU. At 1 p.m. to 2 p.m. I attended Sacraments II class in which my group presented the Communion rite of Mass at the 6th floor chapel. I went to Father Edi’s apartment to join Father Jack, CM, Petrus, Syafa, Ignas and Dharmawan to have lunch celebrating Thanksgiving Day that is coincided with my birthday today. I enjoyed the Indonesian food cooked by Father Jack. Thanks to Father Edi and Father Jack who invited us to have this special lunch.
In the evening, in the supper, my Xaverian theology community where I live celebrated my birthday with the usual tradition: the light was off, song was sung…happy birthday as Petrus played the guitar, a cake came to me, blowing the candles and before that I made a wish: may next year I will make my final vows on 5 November 2005 as the will of God….’Insya Allah’ then I got a gift, a nice red sweater and birthday card. Thank you for all of my brothers in the community, who pray and give me this gift. Today I also thank to others who envoyed their sympathy to my birthday, namely, Tina-Jakarta, Marsel-Manila, Maryono-Mexico City who sent me e-mail; also Father Bob Maloney, SX by his phone call from Boston and Harno as well from Milwaukee at night.
At night the grace of God unceasingly comes to my special day with snowing in this early Winter Season as though the nature participates and understands my gratification. Thank you God for your grace that pours down at the end of this day.
Thursday, November 25, 2004. In the morning at 8.30 we altogether headed to Franklin community in Milwaukee to celebrate Thanksgiving Day with Mass at 11 a.m. and special lunch such as turkey and pumpkin pie. In the Mass presided by Father Rocco, he read a letter from Father Joe Mateucig, SX who works in Taiwan. We stayed at Franklin since tomorrow we have a retreat.

Friday, November 26, 2004. Today we had a retreat led by Father Adolph with the topic Community and Communion. We had sharing at 3 p.m. and the retreat was concluded by Mass at 4 p.m. After having supper, some of us went back to Chicago including me since I have to do my paper and this journal.

Saturday, November 27, 2004. This day I just stayed at home doing my Interreligious paper while the situation at this house was very silent since some guys still in Milwaukee. At noon I got phone call from Edy-Liza in Chinatown-Chicago to congratulate my birthday; as well as Frans in NYC together with his friends, Gisela and Jenny whom I ever met when I visited NYC last summer. Thank you for all of you who have given attention to me.

Sunday, November 28, 2004. After Mass at Saint Thomas in the morning together with Dharmawan and Father Rocco, I was doing my paper of Sacraments II and in the afternoon I cooked for my community and it was my first time I did not cook rice, instead some simple and practical food: spaghetti, garlic bread I learned from my retreat ministry site and Honey BBQ chicken wings.

4) Hari Minggu Advent Pertama, 28 November 2004

Senin, 22 November 2004. Di sore hari di ruang Pendiri di CTU, saya mengikuti kuliah Sakramen II di mana kali ini kelompok I mempresentasikan satu bagian dari misa dan kami mengevaluasinya setelah selesai. Setelah usai kelompok saya melakukan latihan bagian kedua misa di kapel CTU lantai 6 untuk presentasi hari Rabu mendatang.

Selasa, 23 November 2004. Pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah refleksi teologi di rumah Claretian dan kali ini saya memberikan presentasi dan sharing tentang pengalaman kerasulan/ministry saya dan anggota kelompok lain memberikan insight dan pendapat mengenai sharing saya. Teman sekelas saya bernama Hung, seorang frater dari tarekat Maryknoll asal Vietnam memberikan informasi kepadaku tentang website belajar bahasa Jepang saat kami berjalan pulang. Ia bercerita padaku bahwa salah satu pilihan OTP (Overseas Training Program untuk tahun depan selama 3 tahun) adalah Jepang lalu ia memberikan website tentang studi bahasa Jepang itu: http://www.languageguide.org dan setelah tiba di rumah saya mencoba web ini dan saya melihat tidak hanya bahasa Jepang namun juga tersedia bahasa lain seperti Perancis, Ialia, Spanyol, Mandarin-Cina, dll. Web ini sungguh suatu sarana menarik karena menyediakan bagaimana cara mengucapkan beberapa kata dalam bahasa ini beserta gambarnya lengkap dengan audio atau suara.

Rabu, 24 November 2004. Hari ini adalah hari ulang tahunku ke-30 dan semalam saya mencoba melihat diriku dan berusaha mensyukuri rahmat kehidupan dan segala berkat yang telah saya nikmati dari sekian banyak orang terutama dari keluargaku, keluarga tarekat religiusku, Xaverian dan banyak sahabat dan teman lain yang telah memberikan andil dan jasa tersendiri sehingga saya adalah saya sekarang ini. Saya membuka album photo saya dan saya melihat photo keluarga saya terutama mami dan papi serta para saudara dan saudari kandung saya, lalu saya melihat satu photo menggambarkan HUT pertama saya di wisma Xaverian Bintaro ketika saya merayakan ultah ke-22 dan sisa photo lain menyimbolkan perjalanan delapan tahun kisah panggilan saya dalam pembinaan di Serikat Xaverian. Sungguh indahnya semua ini untuk dikenang dan disyukuri sebagai tahap-tahap kehidupanku di dunia ini. Banyak orang telah saya jumpai selama kehidupan saya di dunia ini dan dalam kisah perjalanan panggilan saya di Xaverian dan mereka semua ini memberikan kontribusi tersendiri dalam hidup dan kehidupanku. Saya menghargai dan berterima kasih kepada beberapa orang yang memberikan ucapan selamat pada saya yang terwujud dalam kartu ultah dari para frater philosophan Xaverian di Jakarta dan rumah novisiat serta pra-novisiat di Bintaro lalu Darlene di gereja Saint Therese-Chinatown Chicago; juga telepon dari teman dan sahabat baik saya di NYC yaitu Frans Slamet yang menelponku di tengah malam namun sayang saya sudah tidur, Mom Oey dari Jakarta yang menelponku di awal pagi hari; melalui e-mail saya mendapatkan ucapan HUT dari provinsial SX di Indonesia, Pastor Vincenzo, SX, Harno di Milwaukee dan Caroline di California, juga Naning di Yogyakarta melalui sms-internetnya. Terima kasih atas segala kebaikan Anda sekalian untuk mengingat saya di hari yang khusus ini.
Di pagi hari saya mengetik paper untuk evaluasi kuliah ministry practicum saya di rumah retret David Darst Spirituality Center. Saya mengikuti kuliah dari jam 1 hingga 2 siang di mana kali ini kelompok saya mempresentasikan Ritus Komuni dalam misa di kapel lantai 6 gedung CTU. Selesai misa, saya bergegas menuju gedung apartemen Romo Edi, OSC karena dia mengundang kami merayakan Happy Thanksgiving Day yang tepatnya jatuh besok hari. Kami makan siang bersama di kamar beliau yang khusus dimasak oleh Romo Jack, CM, wah pokoknya asyik dan kenyang serasa di kampung halaman saja, ada laksa ayam, ikan pepes, tempe dan tahu. Ada Mbak Syafa, Petrus, Ignas dan Dharmawan ikut partisipasi dalam ‘fellowship’ kali ini. Entah suatu kebetulan atau suatu rahmat atau disengaja yang pasti ini adalah kesempatan bagi saya merayakan HUT ke-30 saya di hari ini. Matur nuwun Romo Edi dan Romo Jack dan semuanya yang sudah memberikan makan dan makna tersendiri di hari istimewa buat saya ini.
Di sore hari waktu makan malam, komunitas teologi Xaverian di mana saya hidup dan tinggal, dirayakanlah HUT ku dengan tradisi seperti biasanya: lampu dipadamkan, ada lagu happy birthday yang digitari oleh Frater Petrus, ada kue datang, tiup lilin dan sebelum tiup lilin aku bikin ‘wish’ angan-angan tuk tahun depan: yaitu semoga tahun depan bila Tuhan mengijinkan tgl 5 Nov aku berkaul kekal…Insya Allah lalu aku mendapat kado dan kartu ucapan dari komunitasku, hadiah berupa sweater warna merah. Terima kasih banyak untuk semua para sama saudaraku di komunitasku ini yang telah berdoa dan memberikan yang terbaik bagi saya hari ini. Hari ini saya juga berterima kasih kepada sesama kawan yang telah peduli pada saya, yaitu: Tina-Jakarta, Marsel-Manila, Maryono-Mexico City melalui e-mail mereka; juga Pastor Bob Maloney, SX dari Boston lewat telepon serta Harno di Milwaukee dengan telponnya di malam hari.
Malam hari rahmat Allah tidak kunjung putus datang mengunjungi hari khusus saya ini dengan hujan salju untuk kali pertamanya di musim dingin ini seolah alam turut berpartisipasi dan mengerti kegembiraan hamba dan salah satu ciptaanNya. Syukur pada Mu ya Allah atas segala rahmat dan berkat yang Kau tuangkan di akhir hari ini.

Kamis, 25 November 2004. Pagi hari pukul 8.30 kami semua pergi ke komunitas Frankin di Milwaukee untuk merayakan hari istimewa untuk negeri Paman Sam ini yaitu hari Thanksgiving dengan misa pukul 11 siang dan dilanjutkan makan siang dengan menu khusus untuk hari ini seperti turkey/ayam kalkun dan kue pumpkin pie. Dalam misa yang dipimpin oleh Pastor Rocco, ia membacakan sebuah surat dari Pastor Joe Mateucig, SX yang berkarya di Taiwan. Kami tinggal di komunitas Franklin karena besok kami mengadakan retret sehari.

Jumat, 26 November 2004. Hari ini kami mengadakan retret dipimpin oleh Pastor Adolph dengan tema Komunitas dan Persatuan. Kami mengadakan sharing bersama pukul tiga sore dan ditutup dengan misa pukul 4. Setelah makan malam, kami sebagian pulang kembali ke Chicago termasuk saya karena saya masih harus mengerjakan paper dan jurnal ini.

Sabtu, 27 November 2004. Hari ini saya hanya tinggal di rumah saja mengerjakan paper untuk matakuliah Interreligious Dialog sementara situasi rumah ini sunyi senyap karena beberapa frater masih ada di Milwaukee. Siang hari saya mendapat telepon dari Edy-Liza di Chinatown-Chicago mengucapkan HUT buat saya demikian juga Frans di NYC bersama dengan teman-temannya yang pernah saya jumpai ketika saya main ke NYC, Gisela dan Jenny. Terima kasih atas segala perhatian kalian.

Minggu, 28 November 2004. Setelah misa di Gereja Santo Thomas bersama Frater Dharmawan dan Pastor Rocco, saya mengerjakan paper saya untuk matakuliah Sakramen II dan sore harinya saya memasak untuk komunitas yaitu makanan yang praktis dan mudah menyajikannya: spaghetti, roti bawang putih di-oven (yang saya pelajari dari tempat kerasulan saya di rumah retret) dan ayam BBQ.

34th Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 21, 2004

3) 34th Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 21, 2004

Monday, November 15, 2004. Today in the afternoon I registered at CTU for Spring Semester (4 courses) and J-Term in January (1 course). I became realize that studying at the USA cost a lot of money. One course for semester system at CTU costs almost $ 1,500. Since I had known the expense of my study in philosophy and theology in Jakarta, Indonesia was so much cheaper than here in the USA. Probably, one or two course here in the USA can cover my philosophy and theology study for four years in Jakarta. Maybe I couldn’t compare it because they are different standard of life between Rupiah and Dollar, but I just wondered and counted them and it draws me to my reflection question: how do I use this privilege facility for myself and ministry to others optimally? It entails me to concern and to be serious in my study and I have duty to be grateful of this gratuitous grace and to do this formation study properly.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004. In the morning I hosted my theological reflection group in the Xaverian House and this time my classmate, an Alexian Brothers from the Philippines named Zig shared his experience of his ministry. Next week we will have this class at the Claretian House and I will share my ministry experience at David Darst Spirituality Center. Here it is what I am going to share next Tuesday:

Background
My ministry site is at Brother David Darst Center for Justice and Peace Spirituality and Education (DDS), which is located on 2834 South Normal, Chicago-Illinois 60616, close to Chinatown Chicago. The Center is a four-story brick building with neighborhood is middle class with an increased number of Chinese living there. The building was formerly a Sister’s convent located in the All Saints-St. Anthony parish, which is located on the same ground. The Center has been set up to accommodate up to 18 retreatans sharing two people to a room using bunk beds. It can also accommodate two retreat moderators as well as a live in staff of 3-4 retreat leaders.
The Center’s staff conducts immersion retreats in Chicago’s inner city for high school juniors and seniors and college students. Most of the retreats are conducted on weekends from Friday evening to Sunday mid-afternoon. A few full week retreats are given for college students on fall and spring breaks. Students visit and volunteer in a number of sites: homeless shelters, public schools, day care centers, soup kitchens, and the Greater Chicago Food Depository. The staff and students process the day’s activities in a group discussion as well as delve into justice and peace issues concerning the sites they visited, i.e., why there are homeless shelters and soup kitchens in the USA, the richest country in the world. The retreatans themselves plan and conduct morning and evening prayer.
Ministry interns would help plan, conduct and evaluate retreats. They would accompany retreatans to volunteer sites, lead process discussion groups, and supervise the planning and execution of prayer by the retreatans as well as help the activities necessary for house maintenance. When retreatans are not scheduled the intern could contact and visit new sites, work on the newsletter and website and research justice topics such as poverty, homelessness and peace.

Description
On last weekends 12-14 November 2004, there was a retreat program at DDS and I stayed there since Friday evening to Sunday noon. The group who had this retreat came from the youth Lutheran Church in a city of Indiana State, about three hours away from Chicago. There were 14 High School students and five older caretakers with them, so totally there were 19 guests. All of them are the Caucasians. The staffs of this retreat were my supervisor (Sister Paula), Gayle and myself. I was wondering and questioning myself, “Where are the two other volunteers?” I asked to my supervisor and she replied that one has gone and the other is going to Minnesota. As I met my supervisor and Gayle, I said, “Both of you worked hard to prepare this retreat; I’m sorry if I couldn’t help for the preparation.” The opportunity to come to the ministry site is during the weekend when there is a retreat and if there is no retreat, so far I do not go there. My supervisor told me in the beginning that my schedule is very flexible, depending on the schedule of the retreat house and my study at CTU. So far, I have invested enough amount of hours as the requirement 8-hour a week for this ministry.
On Saturday night, while the group of the retreatans was going to Navy Pier for their recreation time and the supervisor went home, Gayle approached me and asked, “What do you think about this retreat and what do you think about Sister Paula?” I answered them honestly what I have experienced and felt so far in positive and negative point of view and apparently she has the same opinion with me. Evidently, she told me many things what’s going on with the other staffs who left the DDS. Listening to her grievance, I just tried to give her courage and support to endure this difficult situation patiently. I implored my concern about her and told her about one passage of John Gospel 6:67-68, “Jesus asked the twelve, ‘Do you also wish to go away?’ Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life” I supported and encouraged her to endure this crisis moment patiently despite many difficulties in this retreat house. I hoped to her that she would be volunteering to this ministry till her previous planning, the August next year.
On Sunday morning, all of us went to Saint Basil Catholic Church to have a Mass. The Mass was started at 10 a.m. with bilingual Mass and liturgy both in English and Spanish and the assembly were mostly African-American and Latinos people. On the Saturday night Gayle said to the retreatans that they could take communion in the Mass. My reaction at that time was wondering and questioning myself, “Isn’t there a rule that the one who can take communion in the Catholic Mass only one who was baptized and has received the first communion in the Catholic Church?” Since I did not have a task to give instruction and lead the retreat, I just kept silent. I paid attention to the retreatans who took the communion and most of them received with wrong manner of their hands. I was wondering also, how come the priest did not know that they are not Catholic. Then I thought most likely in the conversation with the priest before we attended the Mass, the supervisor did not tell the priest that the retreatans are from Lutheran Church and the priest conceived easily that they are Catholic because we came with a nun, the supervisor. I have willingness to discuss about this case next time when I meet Gayle and Sister Paula.

Analysis
Experiencing the weekend retreat with a lot of different things such as language, ethnicity, culture, background, religion, etc., is a unique gift to me. It is still a struggle for me to be able to communicate effectively with all people in the retreat house because I feel that I am the only Asian among them and not a native speaker. I have tried to make adjustment to understand and to be understood by them when I talk and do something. I know that I have an introvert personality (such a quiet and shy person) so I have to be active and creative to create communication with them. The other thing is that I do not have a specific job to say something in the retreat like the supervisor and Gayle were doing. Practically, I was just an observer of the retreat and to be member of the retreatans. As a person I have a compromise type, so I just do what I can do at this retreat such as helping the supervisor and Gayle preparing breakfast and supper and doing whatever my supervisor asked me. I was trying to be present in all of the sessions and group discussions and field visit to some places and to do service there. Considering this situation, no wonder when there was an improper thing happened at this retreat such as the Lutheran retreatans who received communion at the Catholic Mass, I just kept silent. Maybe I am wrong about this, but it was happened in my weekend retreat.

Evaluation
If I evaluate myself, I can say that I need to improve my participation and creativity to communicate to the supervisor and other staffs, and also to the retreatans, not to wait until they ask me to do or say something. I feel that I am passive and so powerless and meaningless.

Theological Reflection
Seeing myself in this ministry, I identify myself with Jesus’ Word (Luke 17:10), “We are worthless slaves; we have done only what we ought to have done.” It does not mean that I have to be passive waiting for the supervisor’s instruction but to be active and creative to involve in the retreat program.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004. In the morning I typed my paper of Sacraments II, Annotated Bibliography II then went to the CTU to have this class at 1 to 2.15 p.m. At night I was reading some articles of Interreligious Dialogue for this class next week on Tuesday and trying to evolve my last paper which is due on December 7.

Thursday, November 18, 2004. This morning I attended my spirituality class in which some four students gave their presentation and I have a chance to do it on December 9, about the Conversion of Saint Augustine. In the afternoon I cooked for my community with menu: sour and spicy fish soup (pindang) and vegetable salad with peanut sauce dressing (pecel). What I can learn of our community meeting this evening is: The mystery of our life is not a problem to be solved but a reality to be experienced.

Friday, November 19, 2004. In the morning I went to Saint Therese Church to have spiritual direction with Father Michael, SX then at noon I joined Petrus and Dharmawan to give some games to some 17 kids of the Saint Therese school’s seventh graders; they looked enjoy the games held in the basement of the church.

Saturday, November 20, 2004. Today is the birthday of Petrus (30); in the evening we celebrated his birthday in a special way, namely, by CTA bus number 6 we went to John Hancock Tower since he never went up there (a café in the 96th floor). We were altogether with Dharmawan, Ignas, Alejandro and Father Edi (never went up to this tower as well) then we called it as ‘fellowship’ to see Chicago by night. While we’re drinking at this high-dark-fancy place, some girls (who celebrated a singleness of one of them before marriage) approached us asking in favor sing a song, then Petrus and Ignas sang ‘Kemesraan.’ We continued savor our beautiful night with Ghirardeli ice cream and arrived home at midnight. I guess it’s the last birthday of Petrus in the USA, so we celebrated with a special way. At home I still had time to iron my clothes in 30 minutes.

Sunday, November 21, 2004. In the morning all of us went to Saint Therese Church Chinatown to celebrate Mass of institution of lector (Chuy and I) and acolyte (Alexandro and Jacques) presided by Father Rocco and three other Xaverian priests, Michael, Aniello and Victor. It’s a quite simple ceremonial rite that as candidate of ordained ministry, we should endure these steps. There are 4-step as Father Rocco mentioned, namely, institution of lector (reader), acolyte, diaconate ordination and priesthood ordination. We continued our celebration with hospitality and lunch prepared lovingly by Father Michael, the pastor of the parish. We thank to all people who witness and support us as we continue our journey toward missionary priesthood in the Xaverians. As Father Geremia, the rector of the Xaverian philosophy house in Jakarta-Indonesia asked me to translate of the Xaverian International Theology in Chicago from English to Indonesian, I was trying to follow up this request as soon as possible.

3) Hari Minggu Biasa ke-34, 21 November 2004

Senin, 15 November 2004. Sore hari ini saya mendaftarkan diri untuk matakuliah yang akan saya ambil di semester mendatang, untuk semester musim semi (4 matakuliah) dan January term (1 matakuliah). Saya menjadi sadar bahwa studi di USA butuh biaya banyak. Bayangkan saja satu matakuliah di CTU tempat kuliah teologi saya hampir 1500 dollar. Karena saya mengetahui biaya kuliah filsafat dan teologi di Jakarta, Indonesia sungguh jauh lebih murah dibandingkan di USA ini. Kemungkinan, satu atau dua harga dua mataukuliah di USA ini bisa menutup seluruh biaya studi saya filsafat dan teologi di Jakarta selama empat tahun lulus S-1. Kemungkinan pula saya tidak bisa membandingkan begitu saja karena standar hidup di kedua tempat jauh berbeda, antara dollar dan rupiah, namun saya hanya heran saja dan mencoba menghitung-hitung serta membandingkannya dan ini mengajak saya untuk berpikir dan berrefleksi dalam pertanyaan: bagaimana saya menggunakan fasilitas dan kemudahan ini bagi diri saya sendiri dan sesama dalam kerasulan saya kini dan masa depan secara optimal? Ini menuntut saya untuk penuh perhatian dan serius dalam studi dan saya memiliki tugas untuk senantiasa bersyukur akan rahmat yang sungguh-sungguh berkat tersendiri dan menjalankan tahap pembinaan dan studi ini dengan sepantasnya.

Selasa, 16 November 2004. Pagi hari saya menjadi tuan rumah untuk kuliah refleksi teologi dari kelompok saya yang diadakan di rumah Xaverian dan kali ini teman kami, seorang bruder dari tarekat Alexian asal Philippina bernama Zig memberikan sharing pengalaman kerasulannya dan minggu depan hari Selasa giliran saya memberikan sharing pengalaman yang juga saya sharingkan di sini (lihat di versi English di atas).

Rabu, 17 November 2004. Pagi hari saya mengetik tugas paper saya untuk Sakramen II yaitu Anotasi Bibliografi kedua lalu pergi ke CTU untuk ikut kuliah ini. Malam harinya saya membaca artikel untuk kuliah dialog antaragama untuk kuliah Selasa minggu depan serta mencoba menyusun paper terakhir saya untuk kuliah ini yang harus dikumpulkan 7 Desember lewat email.

Kamis, 18 November 2004. Pagi ini saya mengikuti kuliah spiritualitas di mana keempat teman sekelas memberikan presentasi mereka dan saya mendapat giliran tanggal 9 Desember mengenai pertobatan Santo Agustinus. Sore hari saya memasak untuk komunitas, kali ini saya masak pindang ikan karena kebetulan ada ikan serta bumbu pindang instant Indofood serta pecel. Apa yang saya dapat tarik dalam kesimpulan untuk rapat komunitas malam ini adalah: Misteri dalam hidup kita ini bukanlah suatu masalah yang harus kita selesaikan namun merupakan suatu kenyataan yang harus kita alami (sendiri, mau nggak mau, kali yah?).

Jumat, 19 November 2004. Pagi hari ini saya pergi ke paroki Saint Therese untuk bimbingan rohani dengan Pastor Michael lalu siang harinya saya ikut melihat dan berpartisipasi dalam permainan yang diberikan oleh Petrus dan Dharmawan untuk anak-anak SD kelas 7 Sekolah Saint Therese. Anak-anak nampak semangat dan gembira dengan pendampingan dan permainan yang diberikan kedua frater kita ini di basement gereja Saint Therese.

Sabtu, 20 November 2004. Hari ini adalah hari ulang tahun Frater Petrus Hardiyanto (genap berusia 30 tahun); di petang hari kami merayakan ultahnya ini dengan acara khusus, yaitu dengan naik bis CTA no. 6 kami pergi ke gedung tertinggi kedua di Chicago yaitu John Hancock Tower karena memang dia belum pernah sampai ke gedung tinggi ini meskipun sudah hidup di Chicago hampir lima tahun; kami ngantri cukup panjang dan memakan waktu untuk bisa mencapai sebuah café di lantai 96. Kami bersama semuanya adalah Dharmawan, Ignas, Alejandro, dan Romo Edi (yang satu ini juga katanya belum pernah ke menara ini) dan kami memberikan judul acara ini ‘fellowship’ untuk melihat dan menikmati keindahan kota Chicago di malam hari. Sementara kami menikmati minuman kami di sebuah café yang cukup lux, gelap dan di tempat tinggi, sekelompok kaum wanita muda mendekati meja kami dan meminta agar kami bernyanyi untuk salah seorang dari mereka yang merayakan malam terakhir masa single-nya sebelum menikah, maka Petrus dan Ignas menyanyikan lagu berjudul ‘Kemesraan’. Kami melanjutkan rahmat malam yang indah ini dengan ice cream Ghirardeli lalu sampai rumah sudah di tengah malam. Di rumah saya masih sempat menyetrika baju selama setengah jam.

Minggu, 21 November 2004. Di pagi hari kami semua kecuali Pastor Pascal, pergi ke gereja Santa Theresia di Chinatown untuk merayakan misa pelantikan lektor (Chuy dan saya) dan akolit (Alejandro dan Jacques) yang dipimpin oleh Pastor Rocco, sx rektor kami bersama tiga pastor SX lain (Michael, Aniello dan Victor B). Misa khusus untuk pelantikan yang bertepatan dengan akhir tahun liturgi tahun C dan Pesta Hari Kristus Raja ini cukup singkat dan sederhana; sebagai calon pelayan tertahbis kami harus menjalani tahap-tahap ini. Ada empat langkah sebagaimana Pastor Rocco menjelaskan dalam khotbahnya, yaitu pelantikan lektor, akolit, tahbisan diakon dan tahbisan imamat. Kami melanjutkan perayaan ini dengan acara ramah tamah dan makan siang yang dipersiapkan oleh Pastor Michael (pastor kepala paroki) dengan penuh perhatian dan kasih. Kami berterima kasih pada semua umat dan sama saudara yang telah menyaksikan dan mendukung langkah yang telah kami ambil menuju imamat misioner di Serikat Misionaris Xaverian.

Sebagaimana Pastor Geremia, rektor Wisma Xaverian di Jakarta-Indonesia meminta saya untuk menerjemahkan beberapa lembar halaman tentang deskripsi teologi internasional Xaverian di Chicago dari bahasa Inggris ke Indonesia, saya bergegas berusaha memenuhi permintaan ini. Saya tidak menjumpai buku tapi rektor saya memberikan disket berisi deskripsi ini, sesuai yang dia kirim ke Roma.

33rd Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 14, 2004

2) 33rd Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 14, 2004

Monday, November 08, 2004. In the morning class of Sacraments I, the professor gave us a quiz that actually I was not ready but fortunately his question was very simple: we just jotted down one the most difficult question in this course then he collected the questions of the students. Creatively, he asked each one of us a question that raised of the students on the questions we wrote down. It made me a quite nervous but finally he stated that all of us passed of this mid-term test.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004. In the morning I went to the Claretian House to have a theological reflection class and this time, Bill Kelly shared his ministry experience as a deacon at a parish. At night I had a class of Interreligious Dialogue and presented our field project visiting a Buddhist temple.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004. Today I saw on television t hat the president of Palestine, Yaser Arafat died at a hospital in Paris. At night I read a book of spirituality and some articles of Interreligious Dialogue class in spite of my dizziness on my head. Fortunately, with my traditional healing and a medicine I took, in the morning I felt much better.

Thursday, November 11, 2004. In the morning I attended a spirituality class and this is the last time for the professor because next four meetings each student will present part of the research paper in the class and I get this chance on December 9. At night we had a community meeting with a topic of ministry as a lector and an acolyte. Our plan is on November 21st, we will have a Mass (9.30 a.m.) at Saint Therese Church in Chinatown for inauguration of lector and acolyte and I am the one who will be the lector besides Chuy and the acolyte are Alejandro and Jacques. At night I typed a reflection for the Mass tomorrow morning.

Friday, November 12, 2004. This morning I shared my reflection at the Mass. It is what I wrote and said:
Reflection upon the reading of the Gospel Luke 17:26-37 for Friday, 12 November 2004.
Our theme of this week is “Eternal Life starts now.” Our reading today invites me to reflect on our precious life that we have from God now. We know that someday we will die but where, when, how we die, we do not know yet. All of these are still mystery. In the Gospel today, Jesus reminds us, “Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses it will save it.” Based on the grace of life that we have now, I make this reflection inspired by an Indonesian Jesuit priest, named Alex Dirdjo.
One day Buddha was sitting surrounded by his disciples and suddenly there was a God’s messenger asked Buddha, “Buddha, how long do you want to live in this world?” Without hesitance Buddha answered, “Eight years.” At that time, Buddha was 79 year-old. After the God’s messenger left, the disciples were grumbling saying, “Master, why you did not ask a million years? How useful will you be for human beings from generation to generation. With his smile Buddha answered, “If I live for million years, the human beings will anxiously prolong their lives and not to achieve wisdom.” People think that the age is more important than a quality of life. Probably, we are in this kind of opinion. People who are eating, drinking, buying, selling, planting, building, marrying, working, resting but they are not really alive. They are not dead but not really comprehend fully of their lives. “Comprehend fully of our lives” in Indonesian word is “meng-hayati”, the root of “menghayati” is HATI, means: HEART. So, “menghayati” means: try to understand and comprehend fully with our heart. How do we comprehend fully or really live our life? There are three ways to answer this question. Really comprehending fully our live means: 1) comprehend fully your own life personally 2) comprehend fully your time at now 3) comprehend fully this place.
1) Comprehend fully your own life personally. You comprehend fully your own life if you are becoming your own being authentically. Maybe I ask myself, “Don’t I comprehend my own life? Am I not myself? Then who am I? Maybe I am not my own self rather a puppet which is not moving by itself but is moved, controlled by the wires which tying hands, feet, head and are moved by a puppet player.” Or maybe I am such a toy game, which is played by a boy with a remote control. Who do control my attitude, behavior and deed? Maybe a tradition in a family or a society, rule and law in my church, and country which control me inwardly without I comprehend fully so that I am not myself authentically. How to cut off this control wires? With paying attention to reactions of my own feelings. Who is really reacting?
2) Comprehend fully at this moment. Understand fully that my past time and the future are not real. Nostalgically thinking of the past and dreaming of the future are not alive, they are dead, not real. We know that my past events are beautiful to be remembered and the planning for the future is good to be planned now as anticipation. That’s correct but it’s not real. One family plan to go for vacation to Florida: the father prepares the route of the map, the mother prepares the food and the children dream of the recreation places and forget to study. Finally they are in Florida but while at this area they are busy to plan to go home and busy to take pictures and forget of the beauty of Florida. Their vacation is not real. Do our lives like this? To much projection to the future? Someone says: “I will enjoy my life after I graduate of the High School. Then afterward, he says: “I will enjoy my life after I marry.” After married, “I will be happy and enjoying life after I finish taking care of my children.” Finally, he died and not really fully alive.” A wisdom from Buddha saying, “If you are breathing, inhale, let you be aware that you are inhale then if you exhale a breath, let you be aware that you are exhale your breath.” Be mindful of this moment because love and grace of God is at our time right now. To be attentive and mindfulness with what I am doing right now.
3) In order to comprehend fully one’s life is to comprehend fully this place at this moment. Coming out of the head and entering into the feeling, to loose a concept and to catch a real experience. How does it work? With returning to our experience at this place right now with listening attentively sounds surround us so that we loose our concept and return to our real experience and the real place right now.
Maybe you ask: “Is it a prayer?” The answer is: if you mean with prayer is a communication with God, it is not a prayer. But, if prayer is a presence or unity it is a prayer. Once a boy comes home to visit his family and his mother is sick at her bed. He said, “Mother, take a rest, I will take care of everything at this house: cleaning the house, cooking for the family (father, brothers and sisters).” Then, the whole day this boy is very busy working, doesn’t have enough time to talk to his mother but the mother knows and realizes, “My son is present here.” There is an inward communication without talking but with presence in the active busyness.
Boenhoefer (a German theologian): “Jesus comes to our world not to give a new religion but to give a life. Jesus says, “I come so that they have life and have life abundantly.” Be comprehensive fully to your life so that you will make Jesus, our Lord and our Father be happy because everlasting life starts now.

At 10 a.m. with Petrus, I went to Saint Therese Church Chinatown to give some games to the 6th grader students of Saint Therese School whose 21girls and boys. This time Petrus taught them to sing some innovative songs and at last some minutes I gave my favorite rope game after they watched a film about Shaolin for one hour and had lunch pizza. At 2 p.m. we were at the rectory and Father Michael gave us durian juice then we left for Hyde Park. After took a rest for a while, at 5.15 p.m. Petrus took me to my ministry site, David Darst Spirituality Center because there was a weekend retreat. Since Friday evening to Sunday noon I was at this retreat center. This time there was a youth group of Lutheran Church from Indiana, about 13 young people and five caretakers. At night while they were visiting Lakeview shelter house, I remained at the center to wait for a participant of this retreat who would come late.

Saturday, November 13, 2004. In the morning I helped Sister Paula and Gayle to prepare breakfast for the retreatans then we went to a soup kitchen named St. Pius to help share lunch to homeless people who were coming to this charity site. There were about 130 people who came to have lunch. At 2 p.m. we went back to the retreat house to have discussion and reflection upon our activity today. In the evening while the retreatans went to Navy Pier for their recreation and break time, Gayle told me many things about the retreat house and some issues regard the volunteers who just left this retreat house.

Sunday, November 14, 2004. In the morning once again I helped Sister Paula to prepare breakfast for the retreatans then we cleaned the retreat house before they departed. We went to the Catholic Mass at Saint Basil Church at 10 a.m. I was impressed by the African-American Dominican priest who presided the Mass using both English and Spanish very fluently. I was wondered that the retreatans who are Lutheran denominations could receive the communion at this Catholic Mass. I questioned this and kept it only in my heart because one of the volunteers told them that they could take the communion even though they are not Catholic. Probably, next time I will discuss this with them as the retreat team. As soon as the Mass finished, we went back to the retreat house then they wrote the evaluation and finally at noon they departed to Indiana. The retreat lasted faster than the schedule so that I could go to Saint Therese Church, not to have Indonesian Mass (started at 11 a.m.) but to have Indonesian lunch and met the Indonesian Catholic friends. This time, Richard (the PWKI/the leader of the Indonesian Catholic Group in Chicago) presented a power point about PWKI and discussed about the continuity of our activity in the future. It was moderated by Father Jack, CM which his birthday we celebrated together at this time. At 3 p.m. I went home at Hyde Park then at 5.30 p.m. I attended a Mass at Saint Thomas for the assignment of the Sacraments II course observing the Communion Rite for the second time.

2) Hari Minggu Biasa ke-33, 14 November 2004

Senin, 08 November 2004. Pagi hari dalam kuliah Sakramen I, dosen (Fragomeni) memberikan test yang sebenarnya saya tidak siap namun untunglah pertanyaannya sederhana yaitu kami harus menuliskan sebuah pertanyaan paling sulit bagi kami dalam kuliah ini di secarik kertas lalu ia mengumpulkan semua pertanyaan dari para mahasiswa. Secara kreatif, ia secara lisan bertanya satu pertanyaan dari semua pertanyaan kami sendiri yang kami buat, masing-masing mahasiswa sesuai nomor urut absen mendapatkan satu pertanyaan yang harus langsung dijawab di kelas. Ini membaut saya sedikit grogi namun akhirnya ia menyatakan di akhir kelas bahwa kami semua lolos dari mid-test semester ini.

Selasa, 09 November 2004. Pagi hari saya pergi ke rumah Tarekat Claretian untuk menghadiri kuliah refleksi teologi yang kali ini, Bill Kelly mensharingkan pengalaman kerasulannya sebagai diakon di sebuah paroki di Chicago. Malam harinya saya mengikuti kuliah Dialog antar agama dan saya mempresentasikan hasil kunjungan saya ke sebuah vihara Buddha di Chinatown Chicago.

Rabu, 10 November 2004. Hari ini saya melihat di televisi bahwa presiden Palestina, Yaser Arafat meninggal dunia di sebuah rumah sakit di Paris. Malam harinya saya membaca sebuah buku spiritualitas dan beberapa artikel untuk Dialog antar agama meskipun kepala saya sedikit pusing. Untunglah, dengan pengobatan tradisionalku sendiri (kerokan) dan minum obat, pagi harinya saya merasa jauh lebih segar dan sehat.

Kamis, 11 November 2004. Pagi hari saya mengikuti kuliah spiritualitas dan kali ini adalah kali terakhir dosen memberikan kuliah karena praktis empat minggu ke depan masing-masing mahasiswa akan memberikan presentasi, bagian dari riset paper kami masing-masing di depan kelas dan saya mendapatkan jatah tanggal 9 Desember untuk presentasi tentang pertobatan Agustinus. Malam harinya kami mengadakan rapat komunitas rutin mingguan yang kali ini mengambil tema pelayanan kerasulan sebagi lektor dan akolit. Kami merencanakan tanggal 21 November nanti, di misa pukul 9.30 di Gereja Santa Theresia Chinatown, mengadakan pelantikan lektor dan akolit, dan saya akan dilantik jadi lektor bersama teman sekelas saya, Chuy dan Alejandro serta Jacques sebagai akolit. Malam hari saya mengetik renungan untuk misa pagi besok.

Jumat, 12 November 2004. Pagi ini saya mensharingkan refleksi saya dalam misa. Ini apa yang saya sampaikan (sorry, masih dalam bahasa Inggris):
Reflection upon the reading of the Gospel Luke 17:26-37 for Friday, 12 November 2004.
Our theme of this week is “Eternal Life starts now.” Our reading today invites me to reflect on our precious life that we have from God now. We know that someday we will die but where, when, how we die, we do not know yet. All of these are still mystery. In the Gospel today, Jesus reminds us, “Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses it will save it.” Based on the grace of life that we have now, I make this reflection inspired by an Indonesian Jesuit priest, named Alex Dirdjo.
One day Buddha was sitting surrounded by his disciples and suddenly there was a God’s messenger asked Buddha, “Buddha, how long do you want to live in this world?” Without hesitance Buddha answered, “Eight years.” At that time, Buddha was 79 year-old. After the God’s messenger left, the disciples were grumbling saying, “Master, why you did not ask a million years? How useful will you be for human beings from generation to generation. With his smile Buddha answered, “If I live for million years, the human beings will anxiously prolong their lives and not to achieve wisdom.” People think that the age is more important than a quality of life. Probably, we are in this kind of opinion. People who are eating, drinking, buying, selling, planting, building, marrying, working, resting but they are not really alive. They are not dead but not really comprehend fully of their lives. “Comprehend fully of our lives” in Indonesian word is “meng-hayati”, the root of “menghayati” is HATI, means: HEART. So, “menghayati” means: try to understand and comprehend fully with our heart. How do we comprehend fully or really live our life? There are three ways to answer this question. Really comprehending fully our live means: 1) comprehend fully your own life personally 2) comprehend fully your time at now 3) comprehend fully this place.
1) Comprehend fully your own life personally. You comprehend fully your own life if you are becoming your own being authentically. Maybe I ask myself, “Don’t I comprehend my own life? Am I not myself? Then who am I? Maybe I am not my own self rather a puppet which is not moving by itself but is moved, controlled by the wires which tying hands, feet, head and are moved by a puppet player.” Or maybe I am such a toy game, which is played by a boy with a remote control. Who do control my attitude, behavior and deed? Maybe a tradition in a family or a society, rule and law in my church, and country which control me inwardly without I comprehend fully so that I am not myself authentically. How to cut off this control wires? With paying attention to reactions of my own feelings. Who is really reacting?
2) Comprehend fully at this moment. Understand fully that my past time and the future are not real. Nostalgically thinking of the past and dreaming of the future are not alive, they are dead, not real. We know that my past events are beautiful to be remembered and the planning for the future is good to be planned now as anticipation. That’s correct but it’s not real. One family plan to go for vacation to Florida: the father prepares the route of the map, the mother prepares the food and the children dream of the recreation places and forget to study. Finally they are in Florida but while at this area they are busy to plan to go home and busy to take pictures and forget of the beauty of Florida. Their vacation is not real. Do our lives like this? To much projection to the future? Someone says: “I will enjoy my life after I graduate of the High School. Then afterward, he says: “I will enjoy my life after I marry.” After married, “I will be happy and enjoying life after I finish taking care of my children.” Finally, he died and not really fully alive.” A wisdom from Buddha saying, “If you are breathing, inhale, let you be aware that you are inhale then if you exhale a breath, let you be aware that you are exhale your breath.” Be mindful of this moment because love and grace of God is at our time right now. To be attentive and mindfulness with what I am doing right now.
3) In order to comprehend fully one’s life is to comprehend fully this place at this moment. Coming out of the head and entering into the feeling, to loose a concept and to catch a real experience. How does it work? With returning to our experience at this place right now with listening attentively sounds surround us so that we loose our concept and return to our real experience and the real place right now.
Maybe you ask: “Is it a prayer?” The answer is: if you mean with prayer is a communication with God, it is not a prayer. But, if prayer is a presence or unity it is a prayer. Once a boy comes home to visit his family and his mother is sick at her bed. He said, “Mother, take a rest, I will take care of everything at this house: cleaning the house, cooking for the family (father, brothers and sisters).” Then, the whole day this boy is very busy working, doesn’t have enough time to talk to his mother but the mother knows and realizes, “My son is present here.” There is an inward communication without talking but with presence in the active busyness.
Boenhoefer (a German theologian): “Jesus comes to our world not to give a new religion but to give a life. Jesus says, “I come so that they have life and have life abundantly.” Be comprehensive fully to your life so that you will make Jesus, our Lord and our Father be happy because everlasting life starts now.

Pukul 10 pagi bersama Petrus, saya pergi ke Gereja Saint Therese Chinatown untuk memberikan permainan kepada para murid sekolah dasar Saint Therese kelas 6 yang berjumlah 21 orang. Kali ini Petrus mengajar mereka bernyanyi dengan inovasi lagu yang ia ciptakan dan saya di menit-menit terakhir memberikan permainan tali favorit saya yang tidak dapat mereka pecahkan, lalu jadi PR buat mereka. Mereka mengadakan permainan setelah menonton film Shaolin dan makan siang Pizza. Pukul 2 siang Pastor Michael, SX memberi kami es jucie durian di pastoran lalu kami pulang ke Hyde Park. Setelah istirahat sejenak, Petrus mengantar saya ke tempat kerasulan saya di rumah retret bernama David Darst Spirituality Center di Jalan South Normal karena akhir pekan ini ada sebuah retret. Dari hari Jumat sore hingga Minggu siang saya berada di rumah retret ini. Kali ini yang retret adalah kelompok Mudika dari Gereja Lutheran di Indiana, kira-kira ada 13 anak muda dan 5 orang tua pendamping mereka. Malam hari mereka mengunjungi sebuah rumah tuna wisma di Lakeview namun saya tetap di rumah retret menunggu seorang peserta yang datang terlambat.

Sabtu, 13 November 2004. Pagi hari saya membantu Suster Paula dan Gayle untuk mempersiapkan sarapan bagi para peserta retret lalu kami pergi ke sebuah soup kitchen atau dapur umum untuk para tuna wisma yang bernama St. Pius untuk membantu membagikan makanan bagi para tuna wisma yang. Kali ini ada sekitar 130 orang datang untuk makan siang di tempat ini. Pukul 2 siang kami pulang kembali ke rumah retret untuk diskusi dan refleksi atas apa yang kami alam seharian ini. Sore hari sementara peserta retret pergi rekreasi ke Navy Pier, saya tetap tinggal di rumah retret dan Gayle bercerita banyak pada saya tentang rumah retret ini dan juga dua volunteer yang baru saja meninggalkan rumah retret ini.

Minggu, 14 November 2004. Pagi hari sekali lagi saya membantu Suster Paula mempersiapkan sarapan pagi untuk para peserta retret lalu kami bersama membersihkan rumah retret sebelum peserta pulang. Kami pergi mengikuti misa di gereja Katolik, Saint Basil pukul 10 pagi. Saya terkesan dengan pastor yang memimpin misa ini, yaitu seorang pastor African-American dari Ordo Dominican yang memimpin misa menggunakan dua bahasa Inggris dan Spanyol dengan sangat fasih. Saya heran dengan para peserta retret yang beragama Protestan Lutheran yang dapat menyambut komuni dalam misa kudus di gereja Katolik ini. Saya bertanya dalam diri dan hanya menyimpannya dalam hati karena memang salah satu volunteer memberkan instruksi bahwa mereka dapat menyambut komuni meskipun mereka bukan penganut agama Katolik Roma. Mungkin lain kali saya akan angkat bicara dalam evaluasi dengan team rumah retret ini akan hal ini. Setelah misa usai, kami langsung pulang kembali ke rumah retret dan para peserta menulis evaluasi retret ini lalu tepat jam 12 siang mereka pulang kembali ke Indiana. Retret ini berakhir lebih awal dari jadwal yang ditentukan seharusnya jam 2 atau 3 sore maka saya dapat mampir ke gereja Santa Theresia di Chinatown karena jam 11 tadi ada misa bahasa Indonesia maka sekalian saya mampir dan makan siang, makanan Indonesia serta berjumpa dengan para warga Katolik Indonesia di Chicago. Kali ini Richard, ketua PWKI Chicago mempresentasikan power point-nya tentang keberadaan PWKI selama ini sambil berdiskusi tukar pendapat dengan para warga Katolik Indonesia lain yang berkumpul dalam acara ini juga dimoderatori oleh Romo Jack, CM yang ultahya dirayakan bersama juga dalam acara ini. Pukul 3 sore saya pulang kembali ke Hyde Park lalu jam 5.30 sore saya mengikuti misa di gereja Santo Thomas untuk tugas pengamatan Ritus Komuni dalam kuliah Sakramen II dari CTU.

dennywahyudi

Friday, June 03, 2005

Sunday of Holy Family, December 26, 2004

4th Sunday of Advent, December 19, 2004

4th Sunday of Advent, December 19, 2004

3rd Sunday of Advent, December 12, 2004

2nd Sunday of Advent, December 05, 2004

1st Sunday of Advent, November 28, 2004

34th Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 21, 2004

33rd Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 14, 2004

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